spiritualmaya

Lydia is going to be BIG Sister!

2012-02-02T14:59:00.000-05:00

Today I am officially in my second trimester! Lydia is going to be a BIG Sister! Baby Gaurkee, kindly referrred to as G2, should arrive at the end of summer approximately August 9, 2012. Almost 2 years from Lydia's birthday. They will be 23 months apart which I think will be perfect for them as siblings. They will be able to grow up together and go to school together. God willing they will be the best of friends.

This first trimester was a little bit rockier than the first trimester with Lydia. The waves of undealable nausea would come over me every evening for several hours. I lost 7 pounds without even trying. The exhaustion has also been overwhelming. Luckily, I have not tossed my cookies but there have been a few close ones. Of course teaching all day then coming home to an active and excited toddler is wonderful but by the end of the night I would fall into bed as if I had been dragging an elephant across town for fun just from the Skyway to the Howard Franklin just to see an elephant dragged. Sigh. Some days I have even gone to sleep at 8PM with the amazing support of my husband. But all in all, I can not complain.

There is a very calming sense about the second pregnancy. There aren't as many wonderings or worries. I remember constantly wanting to know if things were okay in there before and this time I just know that things are okay in there. I also feel a lot more movement than I did last time. I think it's a matter of recognizing certain feelings. We have now seen G2 twice on ultrasound and he/she is definitely a wiggling little bugger. Our last ultrasound as the tech was trying to achieve the perfect angle for a specific test, G2 was trying to wave them away until he/she just flipped upside down as if saying, I'm done. The magic of seeing your baby never quite subsides.

We are tyring to remind Lydia and there is a baby in mommy's tummy especially since she likes to bounce on mommy. She kisses the tummy and pats it softly. It's very cute. Of course, minutes later she tries bouncing again. We say baby and point and so does she, but considering she calls her dolls babies I wonder if she may still be a little curious on why the term is the same. My tummy doesn't take a bottle or go night night, so it must be.

Parenting

2012-02-01T09:53:00.000-05:00

Lydia was born with her amazing personality.

She has a puss and boots from a Happy Meal that my mom has told her that she's afraid of, so Lydia finds it and runs over to my mom and shoves it in her face and laughs. She loves to takes people's seats. As soon as someone gets up, she jumps on in. She was born funny.

At a terrifically early age Lydia had the most stunning sense of balance. She would ride a toy zebra her friend has and stand up on the top of it, let go of her hands and never fall. She runs as fast as she can and kicks the ball. She throws her balls better than some adults I know. She was born athletic.

She will cuddle in bed or sit on the couch and watch cartoons with an incredible focus. She will watch intently and now she follows along with the story. If Mickey says clap, she claps. We have taken her to the movies where she sat for the full film and watched. She was born with the ability to focus.

She speaks Spanish and English. She dances differently to different types of music. She likes some fruit more than others. She eats what she likes when she likes. She sleeps 11 hours every night. Lydia gets mad at the stuffed animals in her crib and yells at them and throws them out. She then forgives then and makes my mom bring them back in. She was born with these unique fantastic expressive parts of her, her father and I didn't parent her that way.

Perhaps it's that old nature versus nurture argument but there is no chance that I could force her to make certain facial expressions or laugh at certain times, that is her nature. I can't not force her to love the cabbage patch doll as much as her stuffed dog Violet. She loves what she loves, it's her nature. Our role as parents is to set boundaries, instill values, and teach her right from wrong. In the process of doing these things to love her fiercely and remain tenacious. As a parent, I pray for her safety, her wellness and hope.

My kid is funny

2012-01-18T08:58:00.001-05:00

The laughter of your child is something that is difficult to put into words. In hopes of not over complicating things, her laughter is simply, divine. My favorite is when she tosses her head back and has a hefty chuckle as if she has heard that one a million times. The sound of her giggle is infectious and it makes every long tiring day turn around to be the best day ever. I want to eat her up sometimes I am not sure I can hold myself back so I hug and squeeze her and call her Lydia.

She has new dance moves every day. Last night she kept pushing the button to her weeble house to get to the dance music tune and she would stick her hands in the air and her butt out and bounce. One time she crossed her arms and shook from side to side. There was little doubt that she was gifted before but now she is a musical savant too. Hopefully dual enrollment in Columbia and Julliard will be a reality by the time she is ready to be in college which I would say would be by 15 however, she isn't allow to leave home until she is 30. So we will see how that all works out.

So I Wrote a Book...

2012-01-10T15:02:00.001-05:00

During the last year I was given a great opportunity to join a colleague in an endeavor to write a book for young adults about religion. Talk about dreams coming true. Not only do I get to write about religion, BUT for young adults which I have been working with now for almost 20 years (18 years to be specific but it's been awhile) in some form or another, BUT I get to be a bonafide published author.

There has been some nervousness involved. Would I be smart enough? Capable? Did I know enough? Granted I had to research a lot. I had to double and triple check my facts because I didn't want any one religion to be looked at poorly by the reader because of something that I had written. Then going through the process of editing. Watching the changes from my words to rephrasing or sharpening of the editors evident red marks on the screen. Sometimes it was too much. By the end, when the typesetting was done and the page looked like what a digital book typically looks like, it sent a rush through my body. My words will be out there. Forever. Published.

Why haven't I been shouting all this from the mountain tops? "I AM A PUBLISHED AUTHOR!" Partly because of humility, I think. Not so humble to claim humility I don't think, however, I do struggle with overt accolades and others thinking that I perhaps would think of myself as better than them because I have accomplished something such as this. It is the Camp Counselor that will eternally live inside of me, that always wants everyone in the room to sit in a circle so we can look each other in the eye, be equals and be supportive. I will go get the extra table or chair to make that happen and I have done this in the classroom, at the bar, and around the dinner table for as long as I can remember. Despite this ideal, I am so deeply proud of the work that I have accomplished. thus it is time to shout! In this moment, I ask all you take a seat around the virtual circle and share in this with me.

If you put my name in Amazon: Christine Ortega Gaurkee the book comes up! I do have a beloved co-author and friend, Jessica Tinklenberg deVega. If you put in her name it comes up too! How cool is that? The title is All You Want to Know But Didn't Think You Could Ask: Religions, Cults, and Popular Beliefs. Release Date is February 7, 2011. (Amazon says Feb. 21st.) You can pre-order your copies!

Happy Holidays and Happy Travels

2011-12-29T22:46:00.000-05:00

Some time has lapsed since I have last blogged, mostly due to the excitement of the holidays. We are now on the road through small towns in Georgia as we make our way to Gatlinburg, Tennessee to meet good friends for New Year's Eve cabin fun. We are currently in Helen which is a quaint little German inspired town at the foothills of the Smoky Mountains. We have enjoyed relaxing and eating German cuisine. Yesterday, we visited Dahlonega which is the home of the Indigo Girls. The night before Cordele.

Lydia is growing just 4 inches short of being 3 feet tall. We noticed just this week that she two more teeth that have bopped through her gums in the further back. Her vocabulary is getting pretty big in both Spanish and English. She can say agua, baby, caca, hello, hi ya, mama, papa, daddy, happy, hat, apple, hot, and tata (which refers to my mom). She says no very well and will nod yes. She can also do almost 7 different animal sounds. She can point out her nose and mouth but is still a little stumped on which are the eyes. Not a day goes by that we are not amazed by her.

At the moment I just spent 20 minutes pacing the halls of our Bavarian styled Hampton Inn pushing her stroller hoping for her to drift into sleepland. She did in fact fall asleep but the moment we returned to the room she was awake again. Last night we just put her in her pack and play and she played until she fell asleep. Both Eliot and I fell asleep before her but the safety of her being less than an inch away in a safe space was enough to allow us to slumber. However when I woke in the middle of the night and check on her she was pantless. She took off her pajama pants and they weren't even pajama jeans. Thus the intention to have a different system this evening. Eh...maybe she was just hot.

Day 3: San Francisco

2011-11-21T02:35:00.001-05:00

It was a rainy morning here in San Francisco so we made the most of it by taking the double decker bus tour. We got to see the entire city. It was perfect.

We made a stop of course at the Golden Gate which is neither golden or a gate discuss. But we drove over it which was amazing since it can swing 27 feet in either directions.

Lydia fell asleep in the bus so she missed this photo op from her ultra comfy stroller.

Afterwards we has a hotdog at Union Square and headed to Golden Gate Park which was built on sand dunes. The sun had come out by then so we made the most of it by admiring the interesting trees and architecture.

We visited the Japanese Tea Garden where not only did we see a ton of amazing gardeny thinhs like pagodas, giant Buddhas and bonsai but actually had Japanese Tea.

We finished our visit at the park by heading to first children's playground in the United States.

It was a great day and we were tired so we decided to head back before meeting Jessica and Heather for dinner. The park is big and the walk is long. We found ourselves in Haight-Ashbury with tired toes when a magic taxi appeared and took us back to the hotel. As I am resting I see that Jessica has posted a photo of a poster of our book that I must see! We get dressed and rush over to the convention center but the exhibit hall was closed. I tried all the doors and seconds before hanging my head the custodial crew came out of the hall. I begged for entry and was granted a moment. I zoomed through the giant room and found our publisher: Thomas Nelson and there it was.

What an amazing feeling! As I floated on air we grabbed a cab and had a terrific dinner catching up. A quick after dinner stroll to admire the Pier 39 Christmas tree before our trek home.

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Day 2 San Francisco: Dinner

2011-11-20T01:15:00.001-05:00

First of all Eliot and I are foodies. Second we really like Top Chef. Third the moment we decided to come to San Francisco we made reservations at Fleur de Lys Huber Keller's restaurant.

We began the meal with champagne and amuse-bouche of gazpacho and quinoa with chorizo.

As an appetizer I selected an Avocado salad and El a fois gras.

Next a seared scallop with fresh bacon. The fish course was so good we ate it before remembering to take the picture.

The meat course for me was a trio of lamb and for El the venison.

The cheese plate offered a well selected variety including a delicious goat cheese but a surprisingly addictive sharp cheddar.

Finally dessert with a chocolate soufflé and els a cheesecake, truffle and cupcake.

This last dish was compliments from the chef a last bit of goodies. My favorite was a mini lemon pie.

The food was wonderful. The best is eating and sharing with each the experience of trying completely new flavors. However fine dining with a toddler may not be the best idea but the staff was wonderful. The server happily brought Lydia milk. The bread boy was sure to give her her own plate. But Marcus, the wine guy, took her for a tour of the kitchen, filled up her milk and showed her pictures of his own girls. He was amazing.

Day 1: San Francisco

2011-11-20T00:37:00.001-05:00

Our first day I was at a conference all day with high school religion teachers. So Lydia and Daddy spent the day together. The visited the Yerba Buena Garden park and the Creativity Children's Museum which happened to be across the street from where I was. They met me for lunch at a great tiny halal middle eastern place before returning for a well deserved nap.

In the evening we had dinner at Union Square at Burger Bar and then went to Chinatown.

The cool window display of vintage sowing machines was worthy of a picture by this craft lover.

Back at our room our queen does a little light reading.

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Day 2: San Francisco

2011-11-20T00:19:00.001-05:00

We started the day walking back through Chinatown and we stopped at a neighborhood park. There were actually more adults there than kids. Folks playing chess and others actually doing exercises using the playground.

We then enjoyed the scenic walk and looking at all the great hills and neighborhoods.

We then spent the rest of the day at Pier 39, Fisherman's Wharf and Ghirardelli Square. We saw Alcatraz from the pier.

We watched the Sea Lions.

And a cheesy pier show.

We explored the Hyde Historic Pier and Lydia napped.

While she slept we picked up some street art including we watched a little old Chinese woman crocheting her hat.

Golden Gate in the background.

Chocolate ice cream and super cute shops.

We finished the day at Fleur de Lys fine dining. Five courses of spectacular food which will need to be another entry.

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Leaving on a Jet Plane

2011-11-16T10:40:00.000-05:00

On Thursday we are going to San Fransisco. I am attending the American Academy of Religion conference and can't wait to discuss issues for secondary school religion teachers (I know I am a nerd, but I love this stuff.) I will also get the opportunity to meet my editor and see my co-author of All You Want to Know, Religion, Cults and Popular Culture. So it will be a wonderful time. I convinced Eliot to come as well and bring Lydia so I won't have to be without my baby for 5 days, thus it will be our first time traveling via airplane with her. I am a little nervous because I don't want to be those people with the crying baby but Lydia is pretty good in odd situations. Other than needing to move around a little bit and drink something while the plane is ascending so her ears won't hurt, I hope that she will rally.

What I don't really know how to navigate are the details like security. Since she is under two she doesn't require a ticket but there is no documentation with her name on it, so do they just assume she isn't a terrorist and let her on the plane but she isn't on the plane manifest? We will take her souped up umbrella stroller and check it at the gate but aren't going to take a car seat. We didn't use one in Canada in the taxis and I know from friends that they didn't use one in NYC with their littles, but will the San Fransisco cabis be as flexible? I will call the hotel to verify the pack and play is placed in the room and if it isn't she can snuggle with us, not a problem. Will the security people allow me to take regular milk with me or should I plan to buy some at the airport? Am I permitted yogurt and other "baby" foods or should I just cross my fingers that Lydia with enough hunger will eat what the world has to offer her? Oh the silly world post 9-11 which has complicated such simple things like domestic travel, however I am SO excited about going and that Lydia gets to come!

Lydia has actually been preparing herself for the trip. She naturally shifted her nap time to be 2:30-5:30 which works wonderfully for travel with a Western time change. She is gifted! San Fran here we come!

Dancing Machine

2011-11-15T14:54:00.000-05:00

It dawned on me how much my daughter loves to dance. She has been dancing since she could pull to a standing position. My mom has been dancing with her the cha-cha from the moment she came out of the womb. Her Aunt Heather has danced with her on the streets of Ybor way before she did it on her own. We have had countless dance parties in our living room. Now most of the time she kicks on her own music and shakes it even by herself. She loves music. She already sticks her butt out in the air and drops down as she dances which makes us laugh now but will surely lead to various conversations in her teens. Hilarious! These videos are from April to October of this year.

The Lump

2011-11-14T15:10:00.000-05:00

There is a moment I think in every parent's life that worry sets in and its a profound. What I mean is that it gets under your skin and it takes root in your very core. Your mind begins to wander into ugly territory and you reason that horrible things do happen, what would possibly exempt you? I will unapologetically admit that it is a little over the top BUT I will say I can't quite help it. While I can chalk some of it to my own life experiences that do have some dark days compounded with the over the top Latina that runs through my brain I enter a state of mental panic at times. This time I found a lump on Lydia.
The lump was in the crevasse of her leg and pelvis. It was sensitive to the touch but there were no other indications such as fear, pain or even discomfort. I insisted on taking her to the doctor which Eliot dutifully did. The doctor told him it was a swollen lymph node a result of a small infection on her foot. On the bottom of her foot was a small puncture wound that did look red likely a result of an old house with with old wood floors. She prescribed antibiotics.

The antibotics were diligently given to her twice a day for two weeks. The lump was still there. I reasoned medications are not magic; give it time. A week after the lump was still there. That weird sense of instablity overcame me, asking the eternal "What if...?" Eliot took her back to the doctor today. Intentially I made the appointment with her old school peditrician feeling like she would know. She has been around for awhile. She looked at it. She poked it. Decidedly she said it was a swollen lymph node and that it may never stop being swollen. It could always been lumpy until she 112 years of age. Apparently, since she is little the rapid cell growth sort of stumps the node a bit. It's too small to be concerned about anything else and it is is not a hernia, which was our other thought. She is fine. Thank God. She is absolutely a-okay.

For the love of Food

2011-11-04T11:30:00.002-04:00

When I was growing up my mom would always be making food to feed people that were coming over. Many times poeple would just come over and my mom would feed them. Sometimes people weren't hungry and my mom still fed them. Other times people were completely stuffed and my mom still fed them. And there were times that I would interject on their behalf and try to tell my mom that they didn't want any more food to which her response was to tell me to hush. I remember thinking she was a little crazy and now what I realize is that food was a way to love.

Food love is not so unusal. Some people eat to love themselves. Some people eat with others to show love. Some people make food with love. Holidays are filled with food, therefore this is not a revolutionary idea but when I look at my most favorite memories of family it really is all about the food. It has been years since I have been to Miami for Christmas (and it's still not quite Christmas without going there) but I remember that the moment we arrive to my Aunt's house my uncle was frying up fresh fish. I would delightfully sit and eat with my hands peeling off the lime soaked meat right off the bone allowing it to dance a bit in my mouth to make sure no tiny fish bones were swallowed. As we ate my Aunt and my mom would start talking about what we were going to eat for dinner and as we finished dinner they were making plans for breakfast.

In the dark hours of Christmas Eve morning my dad and uncle would get up to put the pig on the fire. All day there were preparations of food being down black beans soaking, yucca being deveined, cheeses being cut, salads tossed, breads bought and piled. The memories of walking into the kitchen and say "Tia!" (meaning Aunt) and having 5-6 women turning around ready to help responding with "Si?" Meanwhile, we ate. We had breakfast and lunch and of course the feast of food for dinner. We started eating at 6pm and didn't seem to top until 8pm (when the dancing started and kept going until 3am when we ate again.) Christmas morning we would go and have a breakfast feast and a big soup for lunch and another dinner.

Food. It shapes almost every memory, not just for me, but for many of us. Perhaps this is why I struggle so much when Lydia doesn't feel like eating. In a million years I never thought that I would be that mom. But it is something primal about your baby not eating. Lydia eats what she wants when she wants it. The other day a friend came over and her little one ate beans, peas and sweet potatoes so sweetly and diligently. I was a little jealous of how well she ate. Lydia coyly pretends to put things in her mouth and then will drop them on the floor when she isn't interested. She likes macaroni and cheese for sure but all other things are a case by case basis. I worry about what she eats that some how her carb filled diet will lead to diabetes and hypertention in 40 years. I worry about the fact that she doesn't consume enough calories and she could be hungry or that cheese may stunt her growth. I worry that she won't like a lot of foods and she will miss the richness of life without it. So I find myself repeating a familiar phrase of my mother's "Eat! Eat!"

Running and Running and Running

2011-10-28T15:06:00.000-04:00

There are so many folks to point the finger at with this running thing. I have a good friend at work that ran a half marathon, my co-author ran a half marathon, my good friend with two kids in Tennessee (there are hills there, sigh) ran a half marathon, several of my oldest friends are running, so I figured what the heck, I'll run too. I'll drink the running kool-aid. I can be hip. It's trendy, and I can jump on that bandwagon just as well as anyone. And this one is for my personal wellness! Let's Run!

Argh. Running is hard. However, it would be a personal triumph to be able to run just at 5K. I have never been a runner partly because, it's hard, and partly because I played tennis in high school, not much running there. I must admit that it's harder than I though. Knowing enough not to just go out there and run 10 miles on the first day (or 1 full mile) would be unrealistic, I bought the Couch to 5K app which I think will work wonderfully, but that's hard too.

Today I am supposed to run again today. It's rainy, cloudy and gray outside. We are going to Trunk or Treat at church tonight, seems like a lot of effort to run. More than likely I won't run today, I officially site the weather as my excuse, but I do have a gym membership. I keep waiting for that running high to kick in (just after a couple of runs) but Eliot swears that he has never felt it even when he ran cross country. So now I worry that I will never truly be a runner and have allowed the whimpering to take over my motivation.

The goal must be easier to attain. I must but the 5K on hold. Thus the New Goal: Running AGAIN next week....

Little Surprises

2011-10-27T13:54:00.000-04:00

When I get the chance to take a shower I typically start the water first. Now before any nutty environmentalists get cranky, I understand that I shouldn't do this or leave the water running while I brush my teeth and someday because of my carelessness I will be responsible for the demise of human existence, nevertheless I remain a creature of my routines and thus I digress. I take my time getting a towel, undressed and quite honestly pick at my face like an awkward adolescent which should know better not to. That is neither here nor there, last night when I finally stepped into the tub, I almost took a slide on a soaked Bed Bath and Beyond advertisement. At any other point in my life, I would have put my hand in the air in protested at the injustice but it was a little surprise from Lydia.

after eating an ice cream cone

Lydia has a favorite bath toy and it's awesome. It's a Yookiddo Stack and Spray fountain. She got it for her birthday. It squirts water and has all these interchangeable items that make the water do different things, one sprays, the other spins, etc. She is always trying to get to this toy. So if the door is open she will go into the bathroom and stare inside the tub. She usually has something in her hand. As the wheels in her head turn you can see that she is struggles with the ideological quandary of how to get the bath toy without having to let go of the other items. Her latest strategy has been to throw in her toys, or in this case Bed Bath and Beyond ad, and then try to climb into the tub to retrieve them all. She can't make it in the tub, thus we find little surprises.

The Good Wife

2011-10-19T14:29:00.001-04:00

How much TV is too much TV? Lydia watches TV, mostly cartoons, but she runs around and plays. She babbles all day long. For being 13 months, she does pretend play with her toy kitchen, her music stand or barn all the time. Matter of fact at 11 months, she would sit and take little people and put them inside her barn and move them around. Thus I am fairly certain that she is completely on the appropriate developmental road, at this point and God willing will continue to be. Who I am worried about is...well is me.

At the end of a long day dealing with darling adolescents, I get home, I play with my own daughter and once she goes to bed I usually crave vegging out and watching TV. At one point I thought that my tastes in television shows would best be described as vintage. I rather watch a sitcom like I love Lucy or Happy Days than any silly Housewife from any silly county. I like gangster movies like Goodfellas and The Godfather so it would bare to reason that I would enjoyed The Sopranos and Criminal Minds. The girly part of me liked Sex and the City and the gen-Xer in me liked Friends. Since my life has radically changed in the last year, family themed television has become more prominent, shows like Modern Family or Parenthood, even the new show, Up all Night, is targeted towards me and I buy in. My love for food, houses and craft puts me in a faithful watcher of Top Chef, HouseHunters and Project Runway. Sigh. There is just a LOT of television in my life. And I wonder, are my brain cells melting? Is the screen time sucking the intelligence out of my brain?

I spend a lot time on the computer at school either creating assignments, reading emails or responding to them. I shop online. I have relationships that are strictly online through social networking. I travel from point a to point b with my cell phone in hand to fill in any gaps of time. Whether its the need to find out a piece of information immediately or calling a friend, or playing Words with Friends. It is on hand. If I do have time to read, which I don't always, I use my IPad, yet another device. Because my reading time is limited I now download magazines on to my IPad kidding myself that it is an environmentally sound decision. I wake up in the middle of night and I am unable to fall asleep I pick up my phone and play in pinterest to get ideas or trulia to look for our "forever" house until my eyes tire and close for the rest of the night.

Am I trapped under the progress of my technology? Is there too much screen time for 35 year olds? Or is it just a concern for the young? Can I develop ADHD?

I love the show the Good Wife. It very well may be my favorite...

Ketchup, Apple and Mickey Mouse

2011-10-13T14:17:00.000-04:00

Out of the corner of my eye I saw the tip of Lydia's ear. It looked like it had been skinned as I look closer her hair was matted down with blood. In that split second Lydia's last 15 minutes flashed before me and my stomach propelled out of my body and into an unseen pit of panic, instantly I remembered, Lydia likes ketchup. It has become evident that Lydia likes ketchup. She will lick it off a french fry or nugget and leave the ketchup holder on her plate. Just a little earlier I was trying to entice her to eat meat since she is seemingly too young to make choices on behalf of animal rights or diet, I am encouraging her to consume any protein. This time it was in the form of an Applegate organic nugget. I had squirted ketchup on her plate and as previously mentioned she ate the ketchup (more like splattered the ketchup) and left the meat. The skinned ear was a thin layer of Heinz and the matted hair was perhaps more of a future punk rock revolt with ketchup. In a period of a millisecond all of these things things flash and the result was tears. My face simply sweetly released what my head had processed, it was not a broken headed toddler before me but a messy one.

Everyday there is a new thing. It is such a fun time in human development. Everything is amazing. You can ask her what sound a dog, snake or lion makes and she will appropriately bark, hiss or roar. She can come when you ask her, grab something you ask her to grab, and take things from place to place on command. Lydia can say many words: Mama (me), Dada(eliot), Papa (grandpa), Tata (grandma), bye-bye, agua, and donde esta. The other night she amazed us with her ability to say: apple.

Over the long weekend we went to the Magic Kingdom. We had eagerly been waiting to take Lydia and the Abuelos to see the happiest place on earth. While it was certainly the wettest place on earth, I couldn't help but think of the last time I had gone. It was about 8 years ago, perhaps in a slightly more introspective time in life. I remember thinking the magic had been sucked out of the kingdom. That everything looked used. Eight years later with two healthy parents, a loving husband and a blessing of a daughter, I walked off the monorail into a true land of joy. The childlike amazement of Disney World had returned. Every detail from decorated pumpkin Mickeys' to the glimmering Cinderella castle reminded me of so many treasured memories of family vacations and the joy that my own mother always has had for the world that Disney created. There was nothing more magical or heartfelt than watching Lydia laugh at the Country Bear Jamboree, smack Donald Duck on the bill and attempt to consume every iota of "It's a Small World."

At the risk of being overly sentimental my mom loves "It's a Small World" I think because for her it was a symbol of even though she had left her own mother behind in her country that the world was small and her mom not too far. It also conjures up the idea that people at heart were good, and that someday there would be a magical world where everyone could be together. My mom shed a tear watching Lydia and thinking back to her first ride with me on that very ferry boat 35 years ago. In that tender moment, I saw in front of us a Muslim mother with a hijab riding with her own daughter who was about 4 years old. As the ferry turned into the middle eastern part of the world with little girls dancing with head coverings, I shed a tear. I thought about how that little girl has such few images in popular culture of joyful Muslim women. It was in that very moment, that it really was "a small world" and that as a collective we could share in a world of laughter and a world of cheer with our daughters together. Nothing else mattered.

Octoberish Halloweening

2011-10-05T10:42:00.001-04:00

October 1st has come and gone and the weather here in Florida has been absolutely delightful. The slight crisp air in the morning. Amazingly blue and warm but not suffocating days and breezy evenings. We have gone on lots of walks and visited many playgrounds in just the last couple of weeks. Last week Eliot worked mostly evenings so Lydia and I had walking/play time with so many friends: The Rohrs, The Broadaways and The Newmans.

Since the holidays are upon us I have successfully gotten down the Halloween/Thanksgiving box (meaning Eliot got into the attic and pulled it down) and decorated the house. My crafty bug kicked in and I put together a kid Halloween wreath for the inside of the door. And the front door stoop is decorated with pumpkins and skeletons too.

Over the weekend we did manage to go to our first pumpkin patch with Holland and her parents. It was the same one we went to with them last year when Lydia was only about a month old.

Wow how they have grown! This year they had so much fun! And we the parents worked hard to take as many pictures of them looking in the right direction as possible. The girls loved dragging the wagon and towing around pumpkins. We are hoping to go to a couple of other Halloween festivals in the area in the month to come.

Brilliant Advice

2011-09-28T14:54:00.000-04:00

Lydia's doctor appointment went well. She is at the 50% percentile for weight and head size. 75% percentile for height. She is a little ahead of the game at this point with her walking and talking which only makes Eliot and I prouder by the second. I am surprised our pride filled giant inflated selves were able to shimmy out of the exam room door. She did get shots which are never fun, and now we wait to see if her live virus MMR causes the completely normal (but of course I reserve the right to panic) fever and rash a week later.

loving her new chair

The doctor went through her series of questions and asked if she was enjoying her whole milk. I happily reported yes. She then questioned, "in a sippy cup?" to which I responded "no, no need for a sippy cup." Our kind doctor then went into the many many many reasons that toddlers should not use bottles anymore. Shaking my head in shame, I shared my story with one of my besties just yesterday and she gave me a great piece of advice. Advice that should be used with responsible, considerate, appropriateness at all times, but brilliant....wait for it...so good it's hard to keep it under wraps: LIE to the pediatrician.

It never even crossed my mind. Surely I am still the last vestige of the generation that always has clean underwear on before going to the doctor's and always tells the doctor everything, no matter what. Of course the advise is telling a white lie. Will my child be hurt or damaged physically or emotionally if she is still drinking from a bottle at 15 months? No. There are a whole list of these that can apply whether it's the pacifer or sleeping in the crib, since every kid is different and every parent is too. Therefore, a white lie will do just fine. It will serve the doctor's check list, I won't feel guilty, and Lydia will not be taking a bottle to the dorms in Gainesville. This is what we consider a WIN WIN WIN in parenting!

*disclaimer* if your child is not doing normal things like sitting up, talking, or other motor things at the appropriate stage be sure to tell the pediatrician, it could be a sign of something more serious. Sorry felt obligated to include this.

A Whole New Tooth, Sticks and a NEW decree!

2011-09-23T14:14:00.000-04:00

Since Lydia has so many teeth we have added the habit a few weeks back of brushing her teeth. She thinks it's hilarious. The video is of her first time brushing. As for now she thinks it's a treat because the under two toothpaste has a little apple flavor to it. As much as she is drooling and struggling with teething I am surprised she doesn't have all her teeth, but all things come with time.

Once a week we meet Stephanie and Addi at the park to walk. Lydia's new favorite thing is that we get there a little early and she walk all over. This time she grabbed some sticks. Glad we don't have a dog, because I am pretty sure she would eat the pour pooches face off if he tried to take her stick.

For months I have been thinking about how to transition Lydia off the bottle more gently than her doctor had originally recommended and then yesterday it dawned on me: Why do I need to do this? i am lucky that my folks are caring for her so there is no milestone that needs to be met by for a care provider. She certainly will not go to kindergarten drinking from a bottle, so why not see if we can just go with the flow. She likes sippy cups and straw cups. She is still a little surprised when they have milk in them, but hey she likes cows milk and it agrees with her, which I hear is a battle all in itself. I did follow the advise of a friend and started to mix the formula with milk a few weeks ago and now she is just milk and so far so good. What's the harm is seeing what happens with the bottle? If she's 15 and still needs one to got to bed I am sure that I can seek help. Right?

Crafty Mom

2011-09-19T14:24:00.000-04:00

I love to be crafty and to party plan. Lydia's first birthday was a great opportunity to do both. Below are some images of my decorating. We had the party in our neighbor park pavilion which was great for many reasons.

I suppose some of my inspiration came from etsy seeing the personalized banners and thinking: I can do that! So I did! I used vintage scrapbook paper that I have been storing up and not using to put this banner together.

Here is the photo display of her first year which included holiday cards and pictures of her with balloons each month.

Below we set up a table with photo albums so folks could take a look at our many family adventures and how much she changed over the year! Some of the albums where the baby shower, her arrival at the hospital, her official baby book and scrapbook. It looks like a lot, but it was a collection of everyone's photos.

I made 3 dimensional hot air balloons with painted #1 to hang from the perimeter of the building.

The table centerpieces where cute and useful. I used paper lanterns and inexpensive baskets for the bottom. I attached wooden skewers to make it look like the hot air balloons. Inside of them there were bubbles, sidewalk chalk and birthday horns.

Lydia's Grandma made her an amazing cake! The basket of the balloon was Lydia's smash cake.

My folks made their famous chicken salad and with the help of some friends, we put together the rainbow fruit tray! I thought was an easy cute thing to do.

Birthday Party Reflection

2011-09-19T13:47:00.001-04:00

At her kitchen from her grandparents

Lydia had a great time at her birthday party! She enjoyed all her friends and family. When I was a kid I clearly remember my mom explaining to me that no one else on the planet was obligated to get me anything, therefore I should always say "thank you" because someone was kind enough to remember me. This simple philosophy, more than likely a momentary reminder before entering someone's home, has shaped my understanding of thankfulness tremendously. It is always so special to me that I have been remembered in whatever gesture whether it's the grocery clerk asking me how my cookies turned out last week, my closest of friend bringing me leftovers that she knows we will enjoy or a quick text from someone asking how my day was.

The abundance of thankfulness over this weekend is breathing life into an otherwise average, in some ways frustrating Monday. There is something about personal appreciation versus now as a mom, the appreciation on behalf of my child.

Eliot looked at me on Friday (Lydia's actual birthday) and said: "One year down, the rest of our lives to go!" I am not sure I said anything other than smile. We have survived our first year of parenting. We have made it through the flashes of initial fears from the first time she slept in her own bed to the first steps she made in our living room. We have survived seeing her fall, having a stuffy nose and scream in pain of a new tooth. We have seen her play with friends, try new foods, and squeal with joy on the swing. Together with each day we have woven the fabric of our family. Thankfulness. I am so profoundly thankful for the life that I have.

Is she alright in there?

2011-09-12T14:56:00.001-04:00

When I was pregnant I would often lay in bed all night without being able to sleep. During this time I developed a healthy addiction to Design Star and The Next Food Network Star which I haven't been able to shake. But one of things I remember the most was wondering; wondering who that little person was in my tummy and what the heck she was doing in there. Almost everyday I would ask Eliot, "Hey, you think she's alright in there?" He would always answer, "Yup!" I would ask him in the morning, afternoon and sometimes right in the middle of those sleepless nights and he would always mumble that same thing. 361 days later my mind wanders in different directions. This time wondering what she is trying to say when she says "YanYanYanYan." scrunches up her face and laughs. She is funny! I wonder what her voice will sound like when she puts together real sentences. She is the best parrot. Just this weekend she has said: gol, donde esta?, doggie, aqua, mickey, Go Gators and free Tibet.

at work at publix

grabbing a bike

Looking at so many pictures of her throughout her first year and seeing all her little changes. How her eyes are not quite blue but not quite brown either. How her big cheeks have grown out. How her big size 4 1/2 feet has done the same. How she throws a ball, kicks it and then chases it just to do it all over again filling her grandfathers' and father's eyes with hope of a soccer all star. She gives kisses and hugs and drags dolls all over the house filling her grandmothers' and mother's hearts with her compassion. This year has been so remarkable and we are so profoundly blessed.

I can not imagine loving anyone more than I love her. I can't imagine life without her. I fear sometimes that as we discuss the possibilities of having another little one. If I could love Lydia's sibling as much as I love her. It's a real fear. Is there enough of us to be able to parent another child as well? To give baby #2 the same amount of adoration as we give her? Is it the same love or does it change? And if it changes what would it be like? Would it take away from Lydia? Perhaps some of these fears stem from being a wonderfully adored only child that has a fantastic relationship with her parents and that has never wanted for anything, really, not even a sibling. What if Lydia and her sibling are not close? How will this all effect her? It is possible that the preemptive worrying is in vain, but how could I not consider the possibilities?

Birthday Party Preparations

2011-09-06T14:02:00.002-04:00

Lydia will be 1 in just 10 days. I can't believe how fast the time has gone. As I pondered what would be the most appropriate theme for her birthday it didn't take long to decide. My parents have gotten her a balloon every month on the 16th to celebrate her month. I have gathered most of the photographs (except sadly two of them). I did add a little twist by making many decorations in the image of a hot air balloon. Ever since I met Eliot I have been a little obsessed with hot air balloons. I love the colorful picture it brings to mind, for someone that is terrified of heights, I love the idea of something as fragile as a balloon gently gliding a person through the skies. Poetic.

October 1 Month

December 3 Months

February 5 Months

March 6 Months

April 7 months

May 8 months

June 9 months

July 10 Months

In my complete crafty nuttiness, I have made a pennant banner, garland, a pinata, paper hanging hot air balloons with #1 painted on, hot air balloon centerpieces filled with bubbles, sidewalk chalk and celebration horns. The grandma's are also hard at work with some food preparations (chicken salad and designer cakes should be expected). The favors are done with personalized labels from Lydia. It sounds like a lot but I think I was born to be a party planner. And I have cultivated some close friendships with the people at Michael's.

For Cubans first birthdays are giant parties and though ever baby website and book I own says to keep things small and low key. The blood racing in my veins screams Hooray, Let's Celebrate! My family usually roasts an entire pork, eats for hours, drinks for longer and dances until dawn. The next morning there would be a small group of tired women cleaning up and my dad and uncle figuring out what we were going to all have for dinner that night. Big puffy dresses, big cakes and a lot of people you love. Somehow I don't have one memory of any of my younger cousins crying because the noise, because they missed a nap, because their hands were dirty. It was in their blood too, I guess. We won't be having a whole pork or the dancing until dawn. Our friends fill our hearts as always as if family since most relatives live out of town but one thing is for sure, it will be a great time to celebrate!

I am counting down the days baby girl! Happy Birthday Lydia!

Orange

2011-08-26T12:08:00.000-04:00

Today's meal was sponsored by the color: Orange. Here we have Chicken and Rice, Carrots, Apricots and a little leftover apple cinnamon oatmeal from breakfast.

There have certainly been a lot of transitional food moments in the last year. Breastfeeding to formula for 7 months, solids at 4 months, a little water at 5 months, pick up foods at 6 months. She rejected the texture of meat for awhile but liked a Vienna sausages type food wonderfully called meat sticks. Now she doesn't like meat sticks. The other day Eliot found organic chicken nuggets and she really liked those. But not once they got cold.

It seems like she really dislikes reheated food which can be difficult in a air conditioned Florida home and a culture driven my microwaves. The foods that keep her going are piles of fruit. She loves all kinds but lately she likes biting off of my apples, peaches, etc.

The bigger the better. An American girl at her very core I suppose because yesterday I cut up a steamed carrot for her but she didn't even touch it. But when I gave her a whole steamed carrot she grabbed it with zest and ate the whole thing. Matter of fact, she ate 4 whole baby carrots.

She has mastered drinking from a straw but she doesn't want all that water. So she sucks it all up and then lets it pour out her mouth slowly drenching her entire shirt.

In 20 days she will transition to whole milk and her doctor recommended that on her birthday we just give Lydia a cup of milk and hope for the best. She explained that they only need about 12 ounces a day but that it was the best way to get the bottle out of the picture too. I think it's a little too much all at ounce, don't you think?

Muddled Mommy Moments

2011-08-24T13:56:00.000-04:00

In the last year I have reflected on many mothering moments and recently there have been two that have simply taken the cake. Lydia had a perpetual runny nose after a week I took her in to the doctor because we had noticed that she was pulling on her ear a bit and didn't want to allow an ear infection to set in. Luckily, the doctor said that her ears were fine, her chest was clear and that more than likely she was just teething. My precious daughter had become a precious nightmare overnight. All in all with her current 7 teeth we had been blessed with no side affects. We didn't have a series of restless nights or agonizing screams. Matter a fact, each tooth arrived with a delightful gentle surprise and some extra toys in the mouth but nothing that would even be commented on really, in the scope of things. Not until this. Over this past weekend there was no consoling her. I offered her everything that I could think of and she just screamed. I attempted to comfort her, change her, put her down for a nap, feed her, even Tylenol and this child sat next to me on the couch and yelled at the top of her lungs. Just screamed. I looked at her and tried to reason with her. I gave her every cold item I could think of. Eventually I called the child's father who recommended that ibuprofen may be a better decision and could be given to her now. In that time I remember thinking...I got nothing. I have no idea how to help. And while there is that feeling of helplessness, there is also that feeling of why isn't there a 1-800-Help-MOM number that would provide suggestions. Something...just another reminder that there is no manual, my friends and we all do just the very best that we can as parents.

She loves Panera's Mac & Cheese more than anything.

In these high teething days I realized that Lydia really liked cold spoons. I enthusiastically grabbed a couple of them ran them under water and put them in the freezer. Honestly thinking to myself what a brilliant mommy trick. Of course she loves silverware that grown ups use because it is so shiny and mysteriously big in comparison. The ice will feel amazing on her teeth. This clearly is a win-win-win mom moment. A few hours passed and I gave her a spoon. She grabs it with zest and straight into her mouth it goes for a fraction of a second I am delighted with myself. Then I see that her lips are stuck to the spoon. I had Christmas Storied my baby! I immediately dislodged the silver frozen stick from her and ran it under water, again, to melt the ice off. She still liked the spoon.

Enjoying the Just Dance game with her mommy and daddy. (She is much better at it than both of us!)

Summer End Staycation

2011-08-12T14:40:00.000-04:00

Despite the rain we had a wonderfully relaxing time at the beach this week which is exactly what we all needed before getting back in the swing of things. Both Eliot and Lydia had some sniffles thus naps and snacks were a big part of things. We did manage several wonderful walk on the beach and I was thankful for the overcast instead of the hot bright life sucking sun. My dad and I watched several movies.

We played Monopoly (I conquered them all taking them down each one by one) and took Lydia to the playground which she loved.

This morning was our last (for awhile) Friday morning cuddle time. Lydia usually wakes up and I grab her and bring her into bed with me. We watch all sorts of cartoons, drink our morning milk, jump on the bed. Basically take our sweet time waking up and every second of it is lovely. This morning we met Holland and Tracy at the Great Explorations where they successfully explored great things and lunched. We have busy weekend ahead of us celebrating birthdays and going to church come Monday I will be at work. It has been an amazing summer!

Just when you thought it was over...

2011-08-09T00:06:00.000-04:00

Just when you thought pooptastic moments were over something amazingly surprising happens. This evening Lydia and I were getting ready for our last summer hurrah a beach stayacation with the grandfolk. I was cutting up fruit snacks while she was eating dinner. Later we were folding clothes and putting them in the laundry basket. A seemingly normal evening at the G family home. There was no indication on what was coming.

In hopes getting a little art into her life I decided to I put her in high chair and let her "finger paint." I added just one drop of food coloring to spoonfuls of her Yo Baby banana yogurt. She had a ball! I took her right into the bath when the little artist genius was done. We watched the water and bubbles fill the tub its normal 2 inches or so and then I put her in. We dumped her army of duck toys and other bath time fun in and I sat down next to the tub. For a split second I look at my phone to send pictures of my little artist when suddenly I look in the water and it's murky. It dawns on me what that is and I immediately pull her out thinking only of being a lifeguard and how you just close down the pool if what happened happens.

But Lydia was quite finished so we had a situation. I conceal the area, as best as possible and take her to her changing table where I discover that now she has finished. I think carry her to the kitchen and quickly with one hand as most mommy things are actually completed clean the kitchen sink and put her in to finish her bath. Lydia gets happily clean.

Eliot was at work you see so this pooptastic moment was all me. Our tub has a drain problem really from being an old house, it can't be helped too much thus the clean up involved plastic gloves, bleach, pluggers, Mr. Bubbles, old sponges, mops, etc. It was a lengthy process all the rinsing. My hands feel raw from the bleach but somehow I don't really mind. Off to the beach in the clean shiny morning!

Lessons from the Road

2011-07-19T14:11:00.000-04:00

Sometimes you just have to relax about things when traveling with a baby. For example, I packed enough organic food to feed a small village and I used baby 3 packets of it. Lydia likes to feed her self so she got to try things like macaroni and cheese, hot dogs, spaghetti and even strawberries! I was waiting for strawberries because it supposedly a high allergy food but then I did a quick read on the internet and it turns out it is just something to worry about when there is a history of food allergies. She ate from fancy restaurants and truck stops. She was okay. So we were okay.

Not every hotel has a comfy rocker to snuggle up with your little one, read a couple of books and give her her night time milk.When you have a baby that wants to stay up to play all night and that put her in the car trick doesn't seem right since you are on a road trip, well you put her in her pack and play. You let her play it out. There were a couple nights that she out played us. There were a couple of nights she fussed a bit. Overall she slept well every night 10-12 hours not matter where we were. Thus she was okay. So we were okay.

A few more life lessons...

1. The HOV lane does not require people to drive fast.
2. Sometimes when your lost you find exactly what you are looking for.
3. A real friend is a friend no matter how many years or how much distance keeps you apart.
4. I structure all of my days around food which can be bad but also very good.
5. Some stranger pushes my kid regardless if they are 30 years old or 3, I will want to eat their face.
6. I pack way more than I need.
7. I don't use cruise control because it makes me feel out of control.
8. As long as the baby is happy, so are we.
9. The Fast and Furious is a movie and it also describes my driving.
10. I like waking up in the morning not knowing exactly what the day has in store and that Eliot (Lydia too) are at my side the entire time.

Road Trip Day 16

2011-07-18T23:22:00.000-04:00

Finally almost smelling home we decided to get on the road. We just drove home. We stopped for lunch and watched the Women's World Cup on the IPhone which was great except when we lost connection. I had found a Stride Rite outlet store conveniently located on I-4 by our route home. Lydia needed new shoes, so we figured why not. What were we thinking entering an outlet mall on a weekend in the tourist capital of the world? We fought for our parking spot and all the way to the store.

The reason that I suspected Lydia needed new shoes is because she kept ripping them off. She knows how to pull the velcro and kick them off. But she does it with such vigor, I figured we should have her feet measured. Sandals seem to be easier to get on than the closed toed ones. We measured and my little baby feet are a size 4 1/2, almost a 5! I was squeezing her feet in a 3! No wonder she hated shoes. Bad mommy!

We got home and my folks came over which gave us the perfect opportunity to get everything put away everything, start laundry and start relaxing, on the first night home. It was perfect for them to love on their grand-daughter. Then today the Gaurkee Clan came over and we went to dinner for some more grandfolk and family love.

We had a fantastic trip but it is good to home!

Road Trip Day 15

2011-07-17T00:13:00.001-04:00

As anticipated we woke up late morning, past the extended continental breakfast, and slowly packed out things for the second to last time before venturing through the last of the southern states. Our first stop was the Triangle Waffle. When we entered there was a young tall guy standing by the interior doors with the thickest southern draw I have ever heard, it took my head a second to decode what he was saying. It was tiny, filled with people, cheap and tasty. A perfect combination, they even tried to figure out what the diner food focus could do to feed my baby. With filled tummies we headed to Savannah.

But not without a perfect cheese-ball stop at South of the Border. If you haven' t been there it's worth it to chuckle at the pure absurdity and brilliance of the place. If you have been there, you know what I mean. We took the requisite pictures, played in the World of Hats and I got a milk shake.

I have been to Savannah twice I think. Once with my college roommate and another time in high school with my parents. Neither time did I apparently really see Savannah. It is simply lovely. At an extra slow pace we walked through the downtown successfully without joining a walking tour which for the record I really dislike. We made it to the river area and put in our name for dinner at Huey On the River. We saw local artists work in a local gallery and enjoyed street performers. After an amazing meal where both Eliot and I have decided that after 35 years of disliking grits we are now super fans. The meal was so good that we just sat there while Lydia tore up the table. Normally we stop this sort of thing but it was 10pm with our party girl baby and we were stuffed, so we watched and took pictures. We took dessert to-go and are now lazily watching TV in the hotel room which we haven't done in two and half weeks.

peek-a-boo

Road Trip Day 14

2011-07-16T23:09:00.000-04:00

The modest Amish and the odd Dutch food somehow lead us to Bittersweet Baltimore. The row houses were amazing but the poverty was overwhelming. When we arrived to the hotel Eliot typically grabs a giant stack of brochures and provides suggests for what would be the best things for us to see. It turns out Port Discovery which is another children’s museum is the fourth best in the nation, so having already gone to the first best, we thought we should check it out. There was also a nearby Holocaust Memorial, John Hopkins, the Inner Harbor and bookstore, Washington Memorial at Mount Vernon and the Baltimore Museum of Art….and of course Charm City Cakes. We hit them all! We had a fantastic day. We drove through beautiful areas of the city and through strips where the houses were disintegrating from the inside out. It seemed like this was one of those cities where the rich are very rich and the poor and sadly very poor.

Lydia loved the museum though I would say Port Discovery didn’t compare to The Children’s Museum of Indianapolis. They did have a Tot Trail area and we arrived just in time for music time with other musical toddlers. Lydia was a dancing queen and then enjoyed playing with blocks.

After a great day, we headed south. Our plan was to drive about 5 hours and arrive in Raleigh. Today we would have woken up gone to a couple of parks, grassy areas done a small hike, perhaps a picnic lunch and left for Savannah, but something happened. Friday + DC + 400,000 commuters= traffic. But not just normal traffic, this was ginormous, out of your mind; you can’t believe you haven’t moved an inch traffic without a cause like an accident, plan crash, construction or aliens landing strip. Snails passed us. After being in the car for 4 hours and only having traveled to right outside of Fredricksburg we had dinner at 9pm, thinking that by the time dinner was over traffic would have really disappeared. Wrong. We decided that we were going to need to sleep in the next morning so we needed to get a little farther, so Dunn, North Carolina had a fluffy pillow for us to lay our heads’ on.

Road Trip Day 13

2011-07-14T23:22:00.001-04:00

Pennsylvania is a big state and has so much to offer. So we wanted to get done a million things in a very small about of time. First time in Harrisburg lead us to the National Civil War Museum followed by lunch at the Hershey Story with a sundae dessert so big and chocolatey that I couldn't finish. A dash tot the outlet mall before a ventured through Amish Country. We stopped at a couple of markets, quilt stores and antique shops. We saw beautiful farm land.

We stopped for dinner at The Dutch Family Restaurant in Gap, PA. Hungry and excited, I quickly saw Chicken Pot Pie on the menu. Note: I am Cuban. I didn't know that people didn't eat rice at every meal until I was 13. Therefore, Potpie Dutch? Sure why not. The server told me that their potpie didn't have crust and it wasn't creaming. Okay why not. Not to long a bowl appeared in front of me with egg noodles and an entire chicken breast on the bone. I am not sure but it looked like chicken noodle soup. I had a bite. It tasted like chicken noodle soup and it was cold. I sent it back which I rarely do, and ordered spaghetti with meatballs. That's not Dutch either is it?

Late evening in Baltimore.

Road Day Trip 12

2011-07-14T22:28:00.001-04:00

Back to the USA! After a decant breakfast, a Journey Behind the Falls and an ice cream cone we returned to the US of A over the rainbow bridge. We headed to Lake Eerie to roam and skip rocks. Unintentionally but a nice by product of this trip is that we have seen, dipped our toes and played on the shores of HOME, Huron, Ontario, Michigan, and Eerie) four of the five Great Lakes.

We wanted to get some driving done and fine some new adventures on the way home. In our attempt we got lost. Some where in the middle of no where up state New York. You would think that with two IPhones with GPS that this would be a difficult thing but near the border we continued to bounce from our service provider to the international provider which caused us to lose 3G service and then lost. As we were taking the third or fourth turn about an hour past our mental schedule we ran into Fisher Price, the corporate head quarters, with a store located right in front. We couldn't help it. We had to go in. Not to mention that Eliot and I love the Little People for their multicultural and educational focus but they are the perfect grabbing size for little tikes. They were having a sale. That's all I have to say about that.

We drove. We ate at a truck stop with truckers which was tasty. We drove some more and arrived in Harrisburg.

Road Trip Day 11

2011-07-14T01:06:00.000-04:00

On our next day in Toronto we woke up early and went to breakfast at Cora’s. Cora’s was amazing! Not only were they super kid friendly but even the décor was cheery. The napkins had little sunshines on them (which I couldn’t help but take a huge stack of because they were so cute) and the food was beautiful. Tons of fresh fruit and eggs benedict made with brie and mushrooms. It was a great way to start the day. We jumped in a cab where I held Lydia tight and seat belted us in. All morning at the St. Lawrence Market, Old Town and visited every old church in the area including St. James Cathedral. We took a leisure pace and stopped at several offbeat stops including a tiny garden that Lydia enjoyed.

Feeling as if we had spent just enough time in Toronto we headed to Niagara Falls; only a 45 minute drive. Horton hears a who? Tim Hortons that is. Tim Hortons is a coffee place like Starbucks that is everywhere in Canada. It is attached to Wendy’s, gas stations, malls, free standing, and honestly, just not as tasty. Every exit has a Tim Hortons which when you are looking for something more substantial simple gets increasingly more irritating. Fear not, we arrived to Niagara Falls and moved right into our room which relieved every ounce of stress. We enjoy the view of the Falls and let Lydia play.

We headed down to the Falls and took about a zillion photos and had dinner on the balcony of the outdoor restaurant there to enjoy it even more. We took a stroll back to the hotel at night fall and watched the beginning of the illumination show. Since Lydia was asleep in her stroller we took advantage and had dessert at the hotel restaurant that provided yet another view and finished the show from our room Jacuzzi. It was amazing!

Road Trip Day 10

2011-07-14T00:55:00.000-04:00

There is a little of a learning curve when traveling with a baby. A curve that Eliot and I were not quite aware of, particularly for a big city like Toronto. We have both traveled a lot and typically we want to hit all the major sites plus a few minor ones early in the morning on the first day we arrive to a new place. You may imagine that that quest is rather difficult normally then add baby. After careful consideration we opted not to take the stroller instead we used the Sherpani carrier we picked up at a second hand store on the way up through Georgia. An additional backpack with supplies finished off our preparations and we were off, by noon. The late departure into the adventure had us flustered so we chose to take a bus tour located 3 blocks from our hotel in Downtown Yonge that is the easiest way to see the highlights and use the mode of transport to get on and off as needed. We diligently altered our plan and decided that we would get off in just a few stops to see the Castle. Got Lydia out of the backpack and securely on my lap on the top floor of the bus, then realized the sun was out and powerful, so we suncreened, then she was fussy so we gave her some milk, then she took a nap. By this point, we had missed our first stop, decided to pass our next choice and created a small tent out of Eliot’s shirt to protect her from the rays a bit more. The bus stopped for a ten minute lag which gave a chance to grab a Starbucks treat and Lydia to sleep on the seat giving my arms a needed rest. She woke up right before the waterfront stop which we took advantage of to catch our ferry ride. First we had to change a diaper and use the washrooms ourselves…sigh. It was in this process that we simply had to regroup mentally. Take a deep breath and realize that we may not get everywhere. We may not check everything off the list and it was okay. It was more fun to just enjoy the moment. So we did. From that moment on, we let go of all expectations and had a terrific day.

We rode on the ferry on Lake Ontario, walked to the CN tower while lunching and finished the full bus tour. While we were on line for CN tickets a generous lady came up and gave us a free ticket, as a result the next day we paid it forward by giving our bus tickets that were good for 7 days to another couple. Seven hours of touring, Lydia fell asleep in the pack and we headed to the hotel for showers. We were renewed, grabbed our stroller and found a great strip of places for dinner. Adega, on Elm, was tasty but not child friendly. They didn’t have high chairs. The waiter kept bumping into our stroller and forgetting we had our baby with us. There certainly were not any kid meals, but we enjoyed a decadent meal ourselves and ignore the pompous attitude of the server. We gave Lydia bits of our dinners which ended up to be fine and walked leisurely around the city after 10 as she slept in the stroller comfortably.

Road Trip Day 9

2011-07-11T10:38:00.001-04:00

Oh Canada! This morning we woke up and went to church at Kevin's new parish, St. Francis of Sales. The church itself was beautiful and it was filled with people. As you look across the room you see people of all different shades of skin. The priest serving was an young man that had grown up there but had just completely seminary. After the service where both babies did very well, we grabbed some tacos to go from the lunch being served in the fellowship hall. We packed up our things and headed out. The drive through Michigan was great and we arrived to Canada.

Getting into Canada was a long process. First we had to pay a toll in a pretty long line and then we had to go through customs which was another long line. Once we were through we stopped and got information in Ontario and visited a shoreline park to stretch out legs and to see Lake Huron. I stuck my toes in it and it was cold (shocker but I think it was less cold than Lake Michigan) and we headed diligently to Toronto. The city is beautiful however we did arrive here a bit late with a sleeping baby, therefore we opted for a night in with room service and Canada's HGTV.

Lydia did wake up in the new room which made it easier to change her diaper, but on pajamas and give her a bit more of milk. We put her in the pack and play where she bounced and played for almost 2 hours. We both fell asleep before she did.

Road Trip Day 8

2011-07-11T10:34:00.000-04:00

The day began with a trip to the Holland Farmer's Market conveniently located at the far end of the main street downtown which was filled with over 25 vendors. Everything was fresh and local. In center aisle were various street performers ready to entertain including college groups, a young violinist and a puppeteer. We picked up homemade pizza crust for dinner which was delicious. Afterwards we ran some some errands and vegged out together. The babies played and played and played.

There was a park right across the street so we took the kids there for a bit before having Captain Sundae. Their signature sundaes are so yummy that even our former president big "W" visited there. The evening ended early for the tired babes but the grown ups played "what's yours like" and "boogle" and we for spanked in both. Retribution for Knoxville. Then my bestie and I stayed up way too late solving all of life's and the world's problems. (Let me know if anyone needs to peek and the answers.)

We had such a wonderful time with our amazing friends in a truly special town. Even Eliot liked it so much that he said he'd deal with the snow to live there.

Location:Holland

Road Trip Day 7

2011-07-09T14:44:00.001-04:00

There is little that is not delightful about Holland MI. Yesterday we went cherry picking.

We then went to Sagatuck walked around a darling downtown area and ate the best ice cream. We dined at the New Holland Brewing Company which had great microbrews and tasty food. Lydia drank from a straw for the first time.

Afterwards we event to great Lake Michigan.

Wow what a spectacular view and gorgeous beach. I'd never seen a dune and certainly never climbed one.

We are having a wonderful time with friends and loving exploring their new town.

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Location:Holland

Road Trip Day 6

2011-07-08T10:57:00.001-04:00

We arrived yesterday to Michigan, the land of the Dutch, Holland to see our Hilgerts.

We had a wonderful cookout last night on Lake Macatawa. Lydia and Henning enjoyed playing in the sand.

Lydia being pensive and considering what should be her next item to try to eat. She repeatedly would stand up and try to walk but the sand was to much for her, so she crawled.

We then walked around the very charming downtown filled with street performers and young families. Several adorable shops to see but of course the best part was just spending time together, catching up and for the kids to play together. Henning is such a lover and happily cuddles with all of us. You just want to eat 'em up! Lydia is really loving all the playing together.

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Location:Holland

Road Trip Day 5

2011-07-07T09:45:00.001-04:00

We have DONE Indianapolis. Yesterday we headed downtown and began the day with a Farmer's Market. We purchased some delicious peaches that served as a good snack at various times of the day. However this did not stop of from making a pit stop at The Chocalate Cafe. After another quick stop at H&M, we headed to White River State Park and rented a surrey. We biked all over the park. Admittedly I was a little nervous about my baby being strapped in front of a moving vehicle without any other proper safety devices but she loved it. The last downtown stop was at a local sandwich shop which provided a perfect place for Lydia to nap while we ate.

The Children's Museum was our afternoon session of fun. And it was amazing! 5 floors of massive crazy fun more like an indoor playground on crack. We arrived and made a beeline for the Playscape on the third floor since it was designed for children under five. Lydia had a ball crawling, climbing, touching, standing, cruising, walking, exploring...the thing is that while the museum was fantastic for her it made me more and more aggressive. The mama bird growing inside of me wanted to peck some other children's eyes out. Like the kid that slammed Lydia's fingers in the place kitchen cabinet door or the other kid that kept grabbing her under the hollow play tree. Don't get me started on the kid that tore into the Dora the Explorer, Isa's Garden, and started smacking things violently. It was news to me that as soon as some kids see a tiny kid on something that immediately gave them the right to rush her. Even Eliot who is normally much more sensible and rational than I was ready to slap someone by the end of our 3 hours there. The museum itself was spectacular, a definite must see in Indianapolis. It would be fun to bring Lydia back when she is old enough to defend herself (Eliot's words.)

Our last stop of the day was a The Cheese Shop and Gigi's Cupcake across the street from our hotel. We tasted several cheeses from around the world and picked up some treats for the relaxing evening in our room. Lydia played we snacked. It was lovely.

Road Trip Day 4

2011-07-06T09:12:00.000-04:00

Cracker Barrel Rocker

The day that I have been fearing since the moment that I got pregnant has arrived. I have done my very best to protect us all but sometimes a mother can do everything right and still it happens. The worst has happened: Lydia is watching Barnie. I know! I can't believe it either! We may catch a break because she is in an babyproofless hotel room; she can eat wires while sticking her hand in the air conditioning unit instead of watching the purple dinosaur from Hades. Here's hoping.

Ironically, last night we decided to go to dinner at Maggiano's because we had a gift card so it was easy. Normally we would make a considerable effort to choose a local eatery but decided there was time for that. After dinner I had grand plans of getting a little work done but instead we ran to Babies R Us to pick up some teething things because we left our in Knoxville. We took a look at a couple of umbrella strollers because we are in the market for one and I have done a little research. We discussed trying other snacks that weren't organic. We had to laugh because we had just had a completely average evening as if we weren't traveling at all.

Lydia once again astounding us with her ease to got to bed in yet another different location. She was pooped from all her exploring, climbing and playing. Today we head out for an adventure!

Road Trip Day 3

2011-07-05T22:45:00.000-04:00

I have never been a huge fan of the 4th of July. When I was young my dad always had this week for vacation which meant that we were either some random or with family in Miami. There was never a set tradition in place. Once I got older I was a camp counselor for years and then always seemed to be traveling. The years that I was home there are less than fond memories of trying to either fight traffic or drunk people with fireworks or both. Yesterday was such a great day. We woke up and hung a bit before we all headed to Market Place in Knoxville to have brunch. We walked around and took pictures. The kids napped and then we went to Heena's folks house. Where we hung out and ate and ate and ate some more. Their house is on the top of a hill in Lake City, Tennesse which has the perfect view for the fireworks. Some of us sat right in front of the house and others of us sat inside on the couch to watch through the picture window. It was divine.

Lydia has been such a great baby. She has slept in the car. She has charmed Cracker Barrel waitresses. She has managed to play alone in her carseat. She has also watched a little Mickey's Clubhouse. She has a top tooth breaking skin today and sadly we left her teething things in Tennessee. But considering she has sharp white things piercing through her gums she has don't great. For us the drive has been, can't tell a lie...a little boring. There is apparently not that much in Kentucky. Admittedly it's better than watching the latest coverage over the appalling court case verdict.

Today we are in Indiana! None of have been here before and it was good middle location before our next visit to Holland Michigan. This evening we are completely going to relax. Tomorrow are plans are to head to the Children's Museum and downtown to explore!

Location:Indianapolis

Road Trip Day 2

2011-07-03T17:41:00.001-04:00

We arrived yesterday and spent a wonderful afternoon and evening with the Patels and Koshys. The girls triumphed in a vicious game of Taboo and I was a member of a winning dart team. It was a victorious evening!

Lydia has really done pretty with sleeping in different places and beds so far. She has really enjoyed playing in real grass.

Swimming in the pool.

Driving in a car.

More than anything she has loved playing with her friends.

Sharing delicious peaches .

Playing with the singing bobble head frog.

Jamming out on the music table.

It really has been a real treat enjoying wonderful weather and wonderful friends. So thankful for the time with one another.

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Location:Knoxville

Road Trip Day 1

2011-07-02T13:03:00.001-04:00

Quick stop in Gainesville for Starbucks.

We stopped in Locust Grove, Ga last night. The Gaurkees slept in and I was the first one awake (shocking to some of you huh?)

Contemplating the best route to Knoxville. We stopped in Kennesaw for Starbucks and I noticed there was an Once a Upon Time next door. I popped in for a second and we saw a Sterpani carrier in perfect condition for half price. Eliot tried it on and I loaded Lydia in. It was super so we bought it! Perfect trip addition!

Banana snack.

In Tennessee! Less than an hour from seeing the Patels and Koshys!!

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Location:Tennessee

Walking across the USA

2011-06-30T11:34:00.002-04:00

We are ready to go tomorrow after a very fulfilling and lovely couple of weeks of summer school! We have been diligently packing for our road trip. First stop, Knoxville Tennessee to engage in a series of games, an Olympiad of Sorts, so we, the Gaurkees, can take the championship cup of awesomeness home proudly on our shoulders by defeating the Patels' and the Koshys' (should this be Koshi?) meager attempts at greatness. We will also be celebrating Independence Day and we have diligently selected our 4th of July outfits. Then we will make our way, with a possible strategic stop or two, towards Holland Michigan where we will visit the Hilgerts and meet Henning the newest addition to the clan. We will see the great state that looks like a hand (I had a good friend at summer camp for years that would show me his hand as the map of Michigan) and see the great lakes up close in Traverse City and then to Canada! Oh Canada, so many reasons why I like thee. I can't wait to see an tiny bitty slice of it. This is at least the first half of the plan. We will see where the road takes us.

me desperately trying to get her on video but failing so i took this photo

In the meantime, we have been packing. It turns out that packing for a 9 months old is a much harder than packing for an infant. More things to think about and consider. Last night as I was making my 89th mental list of things that needed to be grabbed, when my daughter stood up in the middle of the living room which she does often and took two glorious steps forward!

I was happy to have been there for that moment. Now to wait we to see if she does it again and if I can keep up!

NO!

2011-06-24T09:17:00.001-04:00

Lydia can say NO! She says NO and shakes her head clearly from side to side. Clearly, she knows exactly what it means when another spoonful of organic Chicken Risotto from Earths Best (which sounds good but really is flavorless) comes towards her mouth but suddenly when she is about to smack the laptop she doesn't have a clue what I am talking about. Well, I take that back. She has a clue. She looks up at me with a sly little smile and a devious twinkle in her eye. I can only assume that she thinks that I will cave, that somehow the universe will alter her reality and she will be allowed to eat laptops, cell phones, remote controls and dvd players.

There are those moments in which she will look at me when I say NO and she falls intentionally on her butt and smacks her arms down in a pout. She normally has a loud disgruntle sigh that comes with it. It's hard not to laugh. I am not sure how parents around the world hold it together when these tiny people are so expressive. The worst is when Eliot is across the room and he will look at me when I am trying to redirect her and he starts cracking up from afar.

It really is funny but rationally I know that Lydia eating the dvd player when she is 6 won't be funny, and she may need other kinds of treatment if that becomes a pastime. But the reason you tell your 9 month old NO! now is so she won't be one of those kids that you cringe when you know they are coming over. My mom would always tell me not to be one of those kids. She would tell me the story of two twins that lived blocks away from her when she was young and the entire neighborhood would leave their breezy front porches and hide inside so their mom wouldn't stop to chat with them. Consequently, not wanting to be that lady (how sad not to have any support group) I will tell Lydia NO! hide my tickled snicker at her cute defiance and hope she will be rational enough as she gets older not to be a nightmare.

She is on the move!

2011-06-21T12:39:00.000-04:00

She has been crawling for awhile but she is speeding through the house and most of the time is doing a crab crawl where she has her feet flat on the floor but still has her hands down for balance.

Lydia is also a dancing machine! Any music she shakes it up! She has been doing the cha-cha with Abuela since she was just a couple of months home. Not to mention that salsa and the polka (Eliot's part German) are in her blood. Later in July we are doing a Kindermusik class that will be a great time!

Lydia also had her first pigtails! We are gearing up for our road trip of Fun Friend Visits in 10 days!

Religious Division

2011-06-17T09:11:00.000-04:00

NPR and I are tight. If I was telling someone this in person I would cross my fingers and maybe even kiss them to express how tight we are. During graduation season I heard a news report about a high school senior that wanted to say a prayer at her commencement ceremony since she was the valedictorian. Because we need to make news out things that are not always news worthy there were political commentaries on the controversial speech. One expert witness stated " well, religion is always divisive..." and as he continued, my mind drfted and proceeded to get all worked up.

Why is religion divisive exactly? If this commencement speaker stated that she was going to pray, does that actually force others to do the same? Does that actually change the beliefs of someone in the audience? Would an atheist suddenly say...OH! So THERE IS A GOD! No. What it provides is a moment for the girl. The girl that is charged with the giving the speech. It brings me to my next question, is religion divisive or is it people? Recently I was teaching a group of freshmen about Islam when I realized that they have never lived in a world without the "war of tara", oops....I mean terror. They don't remember life before 9-11. They don't know anything about the images of Arabs without machine guns and of course the proverbial t-shirt that says MUSLIM. Consequently, I have students that began sentences such as, "so you know how all Muslims are terrorists...." And then after discussing that thoroughly another student states, "well most of them are." Really? 1.5 billion people all out to the the United States...we really are a super power! We have super powers from outer space apparently. As a nation we have ingested kryptonite. But I digress...

God is not the divide. God is not responsible for the atrocities of humanity. Don't blame God. I normally wouldn't think of myself as the individual marching on the steps of the capital chanting "allow prayer in schools" because well I don't anyone tell the children what to believe but rather school is meant to teach the children to think. To question. To investigate. To synthesize. And eventually to defend! To declare! To share! But really, don't pollute my NPR with bizzaro blanket statement propaganda about God or religion. Pretty sure, the commencement speaker didn't damn everyone to hell at the conclusion of her speech and thus it was a moment of reflection to be thankful for a celebration.

For me, humanity is interconnected. Faith is one. I could continue to rant. I could argue for religion or for God. For peace. For justice. For freedom of speech. Instead, I will end with this:

May the Lord bless you and keep you,

May the Lord make His face shine upon you, and be gracious unto you.

May the Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace."

9 Months: Exhaustion

2011-06-16T12:27:00.001-04:00

It has been a couple of weeks now since I have blogged. The reason for the this mini-sabbatical is exhaustion. I knew the moment that I went back to work in January that there was no harder or more tiring job on the planet than being a full time mom. Between taking care of the house and taking care of Lydia, the days speed by and I found myself wondering how it happened as I laid in bed at night for the past 2 weeks. Lydia helps around the house some, mostly with laundry.

We have had splash park play dates and pool time play dates. We have been to library story time. Even the stay home days are jam packed with meals, and playtime. Lydia loves her friends! Our entire living room has turned into Lydia's playroom by day. I move ottomans and chairs to create a fortress of fun for her and for me to be able to walk away without her crawling to Timbuktu. It has been absolutely amazing to wake up in the morning and squeeze her tight. Lay in bed together, sometimes watch the Today show as she bounces from pillow to pillow.

Yesterday I started summer school. So for the next two weeks, I will be back to business as usual before we take our road trip. It is hard to believe how fast time has gone. I know that everyone always says that and I try to hard not to think how life flies by us. Lydia is 18 pounds 12 ounces, she is 28 inches long and has a perfectly proportioned head of 17 1/4 inches. She babbles a lot but says Mama Dada and Tata (what she calls my mom) discriminately. She crawls faster than lightening and so often now does a crab crawl with her barefeet flat on the floor. She eats rice, Vienna sausages (recommended and encouraged by her pediatrician who says babies love the texture and it's a good source of iron) and every fruit you can imagine, though watermelon is hands down her favorite. She is amazing! And gifted of course.

Another Mommy Trauma

2011-05-29T19:03:00.001-04:00

Another traumatic mommy moment: earrings. Cubans get their babies ears pierced and I think it's brilliant. All the pain and suffering is on the adults that need the adornment to begin with. As the baby gets older and turns into a young lady she has lovely healed earlobes prepared for decorative jewels for a lifetime.

The thing is that small things can deviate the plan. Much like magic socks there are magic earrings provided by our pediatrician. The earrings have a fastening on the back that supposedly locks. The back clicks and locks securely. Normal life things such as losing the back to an earring happen and well havoc ensues. The thing is that babies don't sit still and just let you reposition the accessory piece. They squirm and fuss and freak, because well, their babies.

I sit now in my old childhood room as my dad holds Lydia and my mom puts in the earring. The bellowing screams of my baby shake my core and if this was Princess Bride you may think that her body was being stretched apart. My cowardly fragile mommy heart is thankful for the valiance of Abuelos. Red faced and wet from tears, my mom gave me back my ringed daughter who was already past the momentary discomfort.

Advice from my dad: when you have to do something difficult, just do it. The longer you wait the more difficult something becomes. It get too big. Then impossible. Just get it over with, kind of like that whole bandaid thing.

Brilliant!

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Morning really has Broken, Me

2011-05-28T09:15:00.001-04:00

Holland's first Birthday Party. Lydia splashing.

Morning. Morning and I have always had a bit of a ah...difficult relationship. She is always so bright and seemingly cheery. There are always birds chirping and the catching of defenseless worms. I have always felt that Morning had a rather unrealistic perspective on the day and I am fairly sure that I am right considering that Morning appears to get hotter and hotter under the collar until Afternoon comes and just takes the heat. I have always had a much better relationship with Night. Perhaps a little darker, a little cooler, much more James Deen less Suzy Sunshine. Night and I have understood one another. Not much had to be said to enjoy the sparkle of the stars or the breeze still trying to cool us off after the raucous created by the others. Ah Night, how I miss you. Even Evening seems like it flutters briskly away in tasks of dinner, bath time and bedtime.

Sleep was always my mother's battle with me. Since I was about the size of Lydia I wanted to sleep when I wanted to sleep. As I got older I could easily stay up all night and still roll out of bed and go to school and do well. Consequently, her battle ended and mine begun. As a college student never selecting an early morning class and shopping at the 24 hour Winn Dixie. As a young adult youth director, always planning lock outs or lock ins and much more talkative at evening Bible study than early morning Sunday School. As a teacher silly morning drowsiness or unenthusiastic lectures were the result for those first period classes. A lifetime of a loving dedicated monogamous relationship with Night has vanished, I am left to deal with Morning. Morning has broken me.

first time at ChikFila

It feels unusually satisfying to accomplish so much by 10am. Who knew that Morning also had a cool breeze? Who knew that Morning came with Lattes? Who knew that Morning created a virtual Snow White forest around you? Quite literally as I write we have heard a blue bird sing and then perch outside our window. Seconds later a squirrel sat on the side fence and wiggled his fluffy tail while licking a nut in his paws. And then a neighborhood kitty sauntered through our backyard. We don't even have to go camping. All this cheer is actually lovely. And though I have lost a good friend in Night, I am not sure I can go back.

Have I mentioned the very best thing about Morning? The thing that really has me walking on sunshine and loving it? Lydia, of course. She is not only awake and ready to do spectacular things at 7am, but she really can't be reasoned with. I can't explain to her to go back to sleep for a couple of more hours yet. So we harness her excitement for life and enjoy every ray of Morning sunshine.

Sock Ye First

2011-05-25T13:28:00.000-04:00

About 8 months ago I took a fast 45 minute trip in search of magic socks. Since then there has been so many changes. Lydia moves! She crawls. She stands. She sits. She babbles. However, I still find myself looking for magic socks. Sigh. What I quickly learned is that most socks sold for infants are really meant for either premies, dolls or in Eliot's case his childhood Super Grover. No real babies with normal sized feet can keep those suckers on. There seemed to be a small window of time that the infamous Gap socks fit but that may have been for about a day and half until Lydia's feet grew again.

Some of you may wonder, you are in Florida. It's summer! Let the darn sock thing go. But don't you need socks for wearing closed toed shoes? And aren't closed toed shoes the best and safest way to learn how to walk properly? I bought a pack of inexpensive socks at Target in 6-12 size. They fit nicely but as soon as they are washed the socks were way too tight and leave marks on Lydia's ankles. So I bought 12-24 months which are a little too big BUT I washed them and guess what? They were still way too big. Sigh.

What is it with socks? Why are the baby sock makers trying to drive me crazy? What have I done to them? Oh dear Universe, I prayed and prayed. Send me fitting socks!! Hear me Oh Lord of Lords, Sock of thy Sock!

Out of the glorious clouds, shimmering with light and glory was the sign for Gymboree. Not all Gymboree socks are created equal but I like the ones that have a little elastic and a tiny bow on the back.Those tend to be okay. So I enthusiastically ordered 10 pairs of socks mostly on sale with an additional coupon. This morning, I put some on Lydia. I carried her from the bedroom to the dining room to put her in the car seat. I look down to put on her sneakers...a missing sock? WHY!!

This is why I only wear flip flops.

Cuba

2011-05-24T22:06:00.000-04:00

I am a Cuban American. I have never been to Cuba but I have been hearing about it my entire life. It was a country of beauty and of progress until the 40 year dictatorship of Fidel Castro under a Communist regime. I think about what might my life have been like if my family had not left. I imagine days filled with so much family and millions of stories about my cousins and I as we grew up. I think about the parks I would have walked around as my parents did when they were young. I wonder what it would have been like to have known my grandparents. Not once in my reflections about what my life may have been like in Cuba am I ever sorry that my parents made the choices that they made. The sacrifices of their life have completely and totally shaped mine. Their losses have been my opportunities. I am educated, well traveled, and loved. I would not trade my friendships, my husband or my beautiful daughter, Lydia for a moment in the imagination of what Cuba might have been. I am tremendously thankful for every sacrifice my parents have made for the hope that I would have choice, free expression, however, that can't be quite it, can it?

Recently, an old student of mine went to Cuba. She is an amazing woman and I enjoy still being part of her life and knowing her as she explores the world. It is her collection of pictures that has sprouted this reflection. I see the sad state of the buildings in Havana, the streets in crumbles, the poverty of the people and the broken hearts of my family creates practically palpable pain around me. A small country that once did so much, is quite frankly looking as small as it is. What can be done? For most of my life, I have shook my head and was secretly thankful that we didn't have the means to visit because it would spare me the sadness that would certainly overwhelm my mom. Now I wonder if there isn't more?

The internet really has done some amazing things, more than allowing me to order cheap diapers and keep in touch with childhood friends, it has given voice to the voiceless. Yoani Sanchez is a Cuban Blogger, only a year old than I. She left Cuba for a couple of years and returned because she missed her family but vowed to live in Cuba as a free woman. She began to blog about the real Cuba. Her blog Generation Y (Y because there was a generation of Cuban people that were named with Y names) is translated in 7 different languages by international partners that have committed to helping her tell the truth about life in Cuba. She has been jailed. She has been beaten. She has been followed. And still she continues to find ways to send her blog posts to be published. She has now begun a Blogging University which teaches other Cubans how to use the internet, blogs and post about their lives. She is trying to empower others to have a voice.

I think about how she and I could have been friends. We could have gone to school together. She and I could have been neighbors. She is giving voice to the missing piece of my identity, the generation of Cuba that I would have been a part of. There isn't much else I know to do, but to support her. To listen to the unheard. To pray for change. To hope for change. To dream for a Cuba that once was. And to someday see the home of my family.

Mourning

2011-05-12T13:36:00.000-04:00

For weeks, maybe even months, I have been waiting for that tooth to pop through my little Lydia's pink gums ever since she was 3 months old and the drool poured out of her mouth. She will be 8 months in four days and she still hasn't gotten a tooth. I asked one friend what to do if they didn't come. She assured me that they would and that they were all in there. I asked another friend, she declared reassuringly that no children go to kindergarten without teeth. And another that reminded me that we aren't in Arkansas (sorry Bill Clinton, no offense intended.)

Yesterday my precious little angel was being a precious little brat. She passionately threw every frozen teething soother across the room. In a moment of pure hysteria she went from inconsolable to laughing. When that tiny little mouth opened I saw it. A swollen spot about the size of a pea in the front bottom. A little white peek sneaking through the skin. I excitedly called my mom and texted Eliot. The moment that we have been waiting for has arrived. Then a twinge of sadness seeped in. From this moment on, she would forever have teeth. I would no longer have beautiful toothless baby pictures and the reality that she was quickly entering a new stage, edging closer and closer to toodlerhood.

I dream of the days that she will say her first real sentence, run through the yard kicking the soccer ball, eat ice cream with me on a swing...growing up is part of the plan. Now and then it just makes me a little sad.

This is her working on that sentence!

Mother's Day

2011-05-10T15:10:00.001-04:00

Sunday was my first Mother's Day and I have to say it's better than my birthday. If you know me, you know I have always loved my birthday. The day before I got a bouquet of roses that still are simply beautiful. On Sunday, we woke up in the morning and I got presents! All of which were sweet, thoughtful and still make me have a silly smile. The card from Lydia was perfect and so was the one from Eliot. Then Eliot made waffles with berries on top and lattes for breakfast. We did a little shopping mostly for my curls (more on this later.) We came back home to meet my parents. Eliot made a tasty late lunch on the barbie and we all hung out. It was a laid back day which is exactly what we needed. It was nice to enjoy our little family. It did feel like I had entered a secret club however, now as I reflect on how I feel as a mom or how I may be different as a mother, my mind goes blank.

I am not sure that I have become different because I now wear the hat of "Mother" but that it has simply become an extension of who I have always been. It is possible that I feel like I have more clear ideas about what I think is right and wrong, but I think that comes with age rather than parenthood. I wake up a little earlier than I used to and go to sleep earlier too, but I think that comes with age as well. I am still silly. I am still sarcastic. I am still a devoted daughter, teacher and friend. Is motherhood meant to simply be a different manifestation of you? Or is motherhood suppose to ignite a metamorphosis of sorts? Oh dear. Buddha is it possible that it's a middle way?

There have been many manifestations of me through the years and I am not always so sure that they can co-exist with what I have always imagined motherhood to be. For example, the "college me" would not have been very good at motherhood. In 1997, I wouldn't name my cat because I felt that naming it could possibly project a possible limitation on the character of the cat and I certainly was not going to be responsible for squelching the spirit of the cat. The imposition of labeling would ultimately define the identity of the cat and what if it didn't want to be Fluffy or Sparky what if it just wanted to be Ralph? Imagine poor Lydia without a name? The cat ended up having to leave because we refused to pay the deposit to keep our animal trapped in doors with us. Sigh. We were so deep.

Nevertheless, over time I have become really comfortable in who I am, and though sometimes I am not so sure I feel like a mom, I am pretty luckily and ridiculously thrilled to be one.

I admit it! We are done!

2011-05-06T12:43:00.000-04:00

I haven't had the heart to publicly write about this yet, but in hopes of chronically the infancy of my beloved Lydia I will. We stopped nursing. We stopped nursing pretty much when she got her cold. It was so hard for her to nurse. She couldn't breath. We tried about everything but we continued to supplement which we were already doing. Before she was sick we went were at a 60-40 ratio. She was nursing about 60% of the time and drinking formula 40% of the time. She made a seamless transition and never once was upset, also I never denied her a nursing opportunity but she just didn't appear interested.

Even though we nursed for almost 7 months (6 months 3 weeks and 3 days) I still feel disappointed. I feel like I could've done more. I sometimes feel guilty even though it wasn't self motivated decision. However I must admit not pumping is a nice bonus. Perhaps the mommy nerves in me wonder if that's why her teeth haven't come out she could have used more mommy milk to make them stronger or why she seems grumpy randomly as if she is suffering without nursing. I also worry about the studies that say formula babies are more likely to be obese or grow up to have adult diabetes. Have I done enough help her in the future?

On the other hand, she is a very healthy (Praise God), happy, strong willed little girl. And I never intended to nurse for more than 6 months (though that did change some once she arrived). I don't have issues with formula or it's benefits. It is simply the beginning of a mothers' worry that she could've done more. I hope.

Summer Loving

2011-05-04T11:21:00.000-04:00

Summer planning is on the way! The calendar has so many things penciled in. We now have our Toddler Tumbling schedule, Humpty Dumpty and Mother Goose storytimes, and Kindermusik class sign up confirmed. We are have our trip dates and the maps are mapquested. We even have a couple of day trips in mind, for those fun days that Eliot has off in the middle of the week.

I have 7 kinds of sunscreen, a beach tent, an umbrella that hooks on to things and Lydia has several swims suits. We may become beach people this summer!

I love summer! Only 13 more days of classes, a couple of weeks of exams, graduation and relaxation! I am teaching a couple of weeks of summer school but even that should be fun! By this time in the year students are not the only ones ready for a break. We all are!

**Pictures are Courtesy of Aunt Heather! We were so blessed and eternally thankful that Auntie Heather, Eliot's sister was able to watch her for three days this past week. Lydia loves her Aunt Heather and they had a lot of fun. Aunt Heather was a super trooper on the day that Lydia's teething was simply awful. They went for walks and to the park. They had a great time.

La Viva Blogaversary

2011-05-01T09:23:00.001-04:00

Rent is the musical for and about the gen-Xers. Though half the characters are starving artists that are not willing to sell out while the other half of them have AIDS and/or are cocaine addictions. I am pleased to report that most of the generation Xers I know are not in either of those situations. Matter of fact, most of us are now married with children and fairly stable career paths. Rent itself was a reflection to the death of la viva boheme, ironically. Shortly into the 1990's, immediately after the end of the Cold War, the children of the baby boomers become adults and slowly find other ways to express and communicate and go against the grain. It is the birth of personal computers thus email, chat rooms, social networks and of course blogs. Today is my BLOGAVERSARY.

For 4 years I have been blogging in this blog about whimsical life musings, travel, food and as of late, motherhood. I suppose that my previous blogs out there in cyberspace were a bit more starving for attention, hating pretension and wanting to cause commotion. Happily I have grown and found a different voice than the VillageVoice. I still love yoga and yogurt, the stage and Buddha. But as I sit here sipping my morning latte, handing my infant organic banana puffs, typing on my ThinkPad, still fancying myself a liberal in support of choice, the LGBT community, I am thankful for the end of Bohemia.

Video Updates

2011-04-29T11:14:00.000-04:00

She is fast! She is up! She is down! She crawling!

And loves to eat real food! Is it time yet for pieces of things? She loves to pick up cereal and yogurt drops!

Lydia's new favorite thing is to sit and roll the ball between us! She does it all the time with her Abuelo so I will have to catch that on video as well.

Peek-a-boo: Where are those teeth?

2011-04-27T15:12:00.000-04:00

Lydia still has no teeth. She will be 8 months in 2 weeks. I know that all babies do things at different rates including teeth. I feel like she has been teething and still we have nothing. I peek in her mouth and I see nothing. I put my finger in her mouth and I feel nothing.

Yesterday I got home and my parents reported that she had had a very cranky day. The night before she had woken up at 4am and nothing got her back to sleep. Luckily Eliot was up early and hung out with her before going to work. Then he put her into bed with me and she fell asleep for 45 minutes watching Mickey. She was super drolly and somewhat inconsolable. When I got home I gave her cold thingy after cold thingy. She would grab one and throw it out down and cry. She was clearly crying because she was uncomfortable. I would stab my own gums with knives if I could save her from the pain. We gave her Tylenol and milk (she was not wanting solids last night.) Eventually she calmed down after 2 short naps and a short walk around the neighborhood.

The rest of the evening was lovely. She played. We read books. She drank milk. She went to sleep. She happily slept all night.

I begin to worry if she will ever get her teeth. What if she gets into grade school without teeth? Or starts to drive? Will she get a prom date if she's toothless? Where are those teeth?!

Dancing Machine

2011-04-26T09:36:00.000-04:00

A student recently told me about a Wii game called Just Dance. Since one of my toughest struggles of motherhood is finding the time to get exercise into the routine I am contemplating the purchase. It seems fun and there are no additional parts or pieces needed. We have a Wii that is collecting dust that I would love to use more but I am not sure I want to make another purchase that would ultimately also just sit there and collect dust. On the other hand, a dance game very well could be answer. To be clear, at least for my own conscience. It's not like I get home and sit on my tush all night. Most nights I don't even sit at all until I fall into bed. We are an on the go family.

I have also committed to running a 5K in the Fall. I have never run more than a mile in my life and I am not sure how to pull that off. Eliot has promised to train with me and that is our summer goal. And a good friend sent me a yoga dvd which I haven't even gotten a chance to crack open. Sigh.

Therefore...

May 1, I am making a re-commitment to health and exercise. I am ordering that game, right now! Dance Sista Dance!

Easter Baking

2011-04-25T13:35:00.000-04:00

Holiday baking is one of my favorite things. This weekend was a bundle of family fun. Eliot's uncle Greg arrived in town on Saturday so we had an Easter/Welcome BBQ and then on Sunday was my dad's 72nd birthday as well as Easter. There are a lot of diabetics in both of our families so low sugar or sugar free items are the best. I made carrot cake cupcakes, ambrosia, chocolate chocolate cake and a mango cheesecake. Lydia helped by cooking on the floor while I worked on the counter tops.

The ambrosia was inspired by Top Chef Masters. A couple of weeks ago they had to make 1960's recipes, this was one of the options. It was super easy to make. I used no sugar added canned fruit, light sour cream,coconut and regular mini marshmallows. It was pretty light and tasty. I think that I would like to try fresh fruit to see if they result is any different.

The carrot cake cupcakes were a little dry. I baked on Friday from Saturday and Sunday. I put the cakes in the frig and I feel that it might have affected the moisture of the cakes. Although, I will say that everyone raved about them. Particularly my dad's chocolate chocolate sugar free cake. A cook is always their worst critic I think. The same goes for an author, or actor, or whatever. We tend to be a little harder on ourselves than others, well at least I am, in lots of areas of life but food is definitely a major place of self criticism. But the important part was that my dad liked it.

The piece of resistance was the mango cheesecake. It was pretty darn good. It's all about the tools. I was able to puree in the food processor. Set up the crust in the spring foam. I used very little Splenda there was no odd ball after taste so almost all the sweetness came fresh mangoes. I have to say that it was the decorative part I was most worried about and I think I did pretty well. All the Gaurkees and Raheb's loved it. Then we took home the leftovers, the Rohrs and Ortegas were also impressed. Even I must say it was creamy and good.

SPF

2011-04-21T08:39:00.000-04:00

About a month ago one of my best friends learned a very quick mommy lesson about the sun when her little one got sunburn. She was just fine (mommy from the trauma and baby from the burn) within the week there was no evidence of the event at all. I was with her and Lydia was about 15 minutes shy from having a similar sunburn. The thing is that we both had sunscreen with us and totally had the mental flash that we should put some on the girls but we fell for the oldest Florida trick in the book. We were in a shady area for less than 30 minutes. Thus my confession: I am a little obsessed with SPF clothing.

First, and I suppose foremost, is my issue with sunscreen. We have several baby sunscreens and since Eliot is of fair skin as well when we are out we all use the baby's Aveeno 55 SPF. The thing is that as soon as it gets warm it melts off your face and it pours into your eyes and it burns! Seriously? A baby sunscreen that leaves you blinded? We also have Baby Coppertone in the car which we have only used once and not sure we have had enough time to figure out if it does the same thing. We also have Neutrogena Baby that we haven't used yet. I am a little nervous because I don't want to burn Lydia's eyes out.

Some baby stores sell clothing pieces that have been tested and advertise a certain SPF level. I think this is a brilliant idea and I am all for getting every summer fun piece of SPF protection that I can find in Lydia's size. Eliot laughs at me because he says that all clothes protect you from the sun and they are just charging me more money for the SPF sticker. Admittedly, it took me several weeks to understand that SPF wasn't embedded into the fabric and it was just a measuring system. Even now I only slightly agree with him that all clothes protect you from the sun but isn't it better to be sure of how much sun protection you will get from a hat or bathing suit, especially for your baby? Or am I just a nut?

Swim Lessons

2011-04-19T11:22:00.000-04:00

At the beginning of the month we started swim lessons with Lydia. They are Parent and Tot lessons at the YMCA. We go twice a week in the evening from 6:25-6:55. Her instructor is an older woman named Edie who is retired but taught elementary school for 40 years. She is a tough old bird with a lot of heart. Eliot and I both go when we can and we both get into the water with her. Somehow it's a little easier in the pool with both of us since we have clear routine. First the kids sit on the ledge on the pool then they jump in. We do arm pulls, leg kicks on your belly and on your back, and put both together. Then we put in them in life jackets and float in a circle while singing "Row Row Your Boat" and then they have some individual time where they try to grab toys that help them do the motions together. During this time Edie comes by and teaches Lydia how to put her face in the water. They we do another group circle and sing "Wheels on the Bus" and "Motor Boat." After our lesson, we go hang out in the play area and let Lydia splash around for a bit.

I thought she was going to freak because during bathtime she really hates getting her head wet but during swim she's fine. Her first swim lesson was her first time in a pool and she though hyper observant did very well. It has almost been a full month and we are surely going to sign up for May and June.We ran into an old friend of mine from High School and one of Eliot's. Community recreation is great! We have looked into a couple of other places and all are more expensive for less time. It has also been nice for her to see Holland Newman twice a week and be around other kids.

She IS GIFTED!

2011-04-14T09:13:00.000-04:00

Lydia will be 7 months on Saturday. I know that every parent thinks that their baby is gifted. But I am pretty sure according to all the books that Lydia is at this point a little a head of the curve. Fear not! I have alerted the Ivies and they are holding a spot for her to select from for the freshman class of 2028.

She can easily sit up on her own! Her Abuela almost dropped the phone when she was filming this one.

She can easily bring herself into a standing position with just about anything that is close to her. She does have a soft spot for the swing.

She claps! (Even more now!)

She crawls! (This video is the best I have. It turns out that you don't always get your infant to do what you want her to do.)

She hangs out with friends and meditates.

Lydia can also hold her own bottle. She can wave bye-bye, though she still a little skeptical on doing it. She may be wondering why we are saying bye-bye all the time to everyone. This has been a very VERY big month!

Baby Friendly: Manatees

2011-04-11T10:10:00.000-04:00

Saturday we did something that I believe all parents do at some point in their babies infancy: drive around for nap time. Since we are still on the mend from the colds it was important for her to have nap time and since the fun of having toys, mommy and daddy is just way too much for our little Lydi we put her in the car. We had lunch first at the Lucky Dill Deli which was great, and started driving. Other than obsessively looking at Zillow while exploring the many St. Petersburg neighborhoods (which is a common occurrence for this HGTV addict) we had not plans. Then we remembered we have been meaning to go see the Manatees in Apollo Beach near the electrical plant. It was just far enough away for a good nap on a lovely day and it gave us a mission. Willingness to be spontaneous is one of things I really love about Eliot.

Saturday was the first of many insanely hot Florida days. I lathered Lydia in sunscreen, put on her sunhat that never goes ultra well and we were off to look for the manatees. It is a great little free spot that Tampa Electric has put together. Eliot and I were in awe of being that close to a power plant. Secretly I kept thinking about Eric Brockovich and wondering what these people were really doing to the manatees which could possibility be a good story line for a Carl Hiaasen book. I digress. We had a lovely little afternoon enjoying not one single manatee. We took tons of pictures and enjoyed their indoor super kid friendly area. After about an hour, we got back in the car which aided to another good solid nap and spent the evening at home resting.

Just That Kind of Day

2011-04-08T11:06:00.000-04:00

My cold just won't go away. After getting home yesterday Eliot and I put Lydia in the car and drove around town for a couple of hours in order for her to get a nap. I got home and was shivering, sweaty and exhausted. I feel asleep for an hour and half. Even though I had already taken a full run of antibiotics last week, I started another run because my snot is still green and my nose is still running.

Luckily, Lydia is seemingly feeling better thanks to all the wonderful mommy friends that I have. Last night we sat in the bathroom with a hot shower running and bathed her using the vapor bath which is essentially eucalyptus and chamomile. Then I wrapped her in several towels to keep her warm while I salved her with Baby Vicks on her chest, back, under her nose and her feet. Dressed her. Put in saline drop, used the blue booger bulb and wipe her with the boogie wipes, which by the way are genius. She slept solidly through the night with Puff the Magic Elephant humidifying her room.

My exhaustion and periodic breathing apparently have effected my ability to reason. This morning as I was running out the door I was looking for my sunglasses. I couldn't find them so I defeatedly got into my car. I was backing up when I realized the glasses were on my head. I chuckled at myself and then smash! I smacked my car right into the side of my parents car. I jumped out of the car and scream several expletives. Ran inside to tell my parent then came to work where I spent the first hour of my day taking to insurance agents. Argh!

Happy to report everyone is okay. Lydia is feeling better and it's Friday. Look at all the silver linings!

Sick Baby

2011-04-07T12:00:00.001-04:00

Lydia has her first cold. She is stuffy and sniffily. Her tiny little nose is red and drippy. It is all around a mommy nightmare. She is too little to know how to blow her nose and doesn't quite understand that the weird blue rubber bulb will help her breathe. The first sleepless night I thought it was teething. I figured she sounded stuffy because she was crying. Her little mouth open and her tongue thrusting against her gums. The next morning she was still stuffy. Later that night she was still stuffy and the next morning...you guessed it still stuffy. So we took her to the doctor's. I was hoping for solutions. I was hoping for suggestions. I got nothing.

We saw one of the pediatrician we had never met before. She came in. She checked Lydia's ears, eyes, and throat. She listened to her chest. She then said well she has a cold. Bring her back if she gets a high fever or she is still sick next week. I am thinking she is insane, is she is still sick next week I may call ....turns out I don't really know any famous doctors except Louis Pasteur and that won't help me. So I am waiting. She goes to leave the room. I ask her about over the counter meds and she says it can't hurt. And she leaves.

We leave the office. I look at Eliot, who had asked if we could take her to her swim lesson apparently not looking at the appalling glare on my face (she was not going to swimming), and said, I didn't like her. He smiled at me. My ranting begins: She did nothing! She is just going to let my baby not breath! What sort of doctor does this!? Why go to medical school if you don't have any thing helpful to share!? I could have gotten the same free advice from the tenth grade twerp that bags my groceries. Then tears start rolling down my face, partly from the fact that I have worked myself all up, partly from the guilt of getting her sick since I waited too long to get on antibiotics and partly from the fact that since Lydia can't breath she hasn't been able to nurse. For the rest of the evening we address the doctor as the evil lady that didn't want my baby to breath.

We went to Target and picked up every over the counter thing that I could think of: baby Vicks, Vicks plug ins, infant Advil, infant chamomile lotion, infant Tylenol, a new filter for Puff (her elephant shaped humidifier) and a blow up mattress in case one of us needed to sleep in her room since it has the humidifier. Thank goodness for Eliot that is willing to be strong enough for both of us and hold her down to extract the boogers with that bulb thing. He has also been voted to be the saline nose dropper. I am the giver of Tylenol and rubber of baby Vicks (which I have decided is brilliant!). With diligence and patience (a perhaps a drop of humor) Lydia slept peacefully and restfully through the night, hopefully she is on the mend! I fell asleep thinking: It's only a cold. It's only a cold. It's only a cold.

Independent Baby

2011-04-06T08:51:00.003-04:00

When we went to the pediatrician I asked how many hours a night Lydia should be sleeping. My doctor, who is a little old school, said she will sleep when she sleeps (a little laissez faire but I am thinking a resounding: check!) she should be doing this in her own crib (I am smiling on the inside: check!) and when we wakes up in the middle of the night you should let her cry herself back to sleep (Eh...not check. not at all.) The doctored continued to explain the importance of this practice because it will help Lydia grow up to be an independent self sufficient woman. Doctor said I should just let her scream as long as it takes. She assured me that Lydia isn't hungry at 3AM anymore and that she is playing me. This stage 6-9 months is a make or break time, my Doctor pep-talked, if you respond to her you will never slept again.

It's been a couple of weeks now and this is still bouncing around in my head until the moment where I realized my 6 months old has no business being independent. She is an infant by virtue of this fact, she needs her mommy (and daddy!) She needs us to respond because what if she is hurt? What if she is in pain? What is she got too tired and really is hungry? Aren't we teaching her that when she needs us we won't be there if we don't respond, particularly in dark times (in this case literally dark times like night but it fits.) I have to say that there seems to be many more studies explaining the benefits to philosophies like the family bed. There is a huge decrease in instances of SIDS for co-sleepers. Family beds actually successfully have proven to have raised much more independent children.

(I just realized that my full blog entry had not saved completely so this is the part that left off. )

Although, Lydia does sleep in her own crib, but if we had a king size bed she probably wouldn't. I am certain that she will grow up to be a brave, brilliant and compassionate woman, thus I will continue to let her "play me". I will wake up and tend to her needs and while I do I will squeeze her tight and give her as many kisses as I can for as long as I can.

Summer Wonderland

2011-04-05T09:25:00.002-04:00

In dreaming of clear blue summer days I have been on a quest to create a summer wonderland in our backyard. Since Lydia loves to swing I wanted to find the Little Tikes Swing Castle which has a little swing, little climbing wall and little slide. It also has a little steering wheel and little telescope in case we want to play little pirates. I refused to pay full price so I search high and low for weeks at all the kids consignment shops in the area and finally I found one that had it in Palm Harbor. I diligently went there and acquired the coveted playground piece.

Last summer I was obsessed with outdoor living so Eliot and his folks built a great patio. We now have a wonderful grill, a table, chairs and an umbrella. We even have a fire pit for those cool Florida summer nights (insert chuckle here); mostly for s'mores making and Eliot likes to burn things. We even have safe lawn darts. The garage has a futon, dart board and extra frig filled with refreshing beverages thus the adults are all set.

The child friendly backyard still needed a few things. I considered what sort of water element I wanted to provide Lydia. I kind of wanted one of those old school hard plastic pools we had when we were kids but the only thing I could seem to find was blow up ones so I opted for a tiny baby pool for her. The last thing on the list was a tent. A portable pop open easy tent that can be used at the beach as well. I did my research and ordered the Genji from Amazon.

When it arrived at the house I was so excited that I dragged the over-sized packing box in with a little help from a friend. I popped open the tent in less than 2 seconds in the living room. It was perfect! Easy as pie, just poof, it was up! It came in it's own carrying case, simply perfect for Florida beach and backyard fun! It's long enough for Eliot to lay in and I can almost stand in it. You can open both sides so you have the wind blowing through your hair and still protected from the blistering sun! I put Lydia inside and she seemed happy too. Hooray! Except for one tiny detail. I couldn't seem to get it back in it's handy case. I tried and tried. I almost poked an eye out. I figured it was an easy instant guest room.

New Mommy Mantra:
         You don't need a guest room in the kitchen
         You don't need a guest room in the kitchen
         You don't need a guest room in the kitchen

Spring Break ReCap

2011-04-04T15:17:00.001-04:00

the d'lux and fried pickles

I apologize for the delay in blogging but sometime when one is on Spring Break the extra spring in your step limits time in front of the computer. The trip to Atlanta was great. We drove up with baby and grandparents in tow on Wednesday night and arrived rather late. Apparently the door to our room locked because someone had accidentally knocked the safety top lock closed and no one could get in, therefore when we went to check in at midnight it was explain to us that the door engineer had been called and we were waiting for their expertise in order to get into our room which was the only a room available during their renovations. Fear not, we finally made it in to room by 1:30 in the morning. Lydia was a trouper considering she was in a completely differently place she did a great job adjusting it was so nice to have her Abuelos there to help care for her.

We visited my mom's cousin and I suppose mine and Lydia's too while were there which was a nice way to start the trip. While we were there we enjoy the beautiful Atlanta Botanical Gardens (during Spring time with the tulips!), Georgia Aquarium (the largest in the world! who knew?), H&M and lots of amazing food! Including food from this seasons' Top Chef champ! Eliot and I both have lived there so it was a slow paced mini-vacation. Lydia loves people and new scenarios so she had her super observer hat on most of the time.

Of course the food was what I was all about. Though we ate a lot there were 3 big highlights. First night Eliot and I went to Nava where we enjoyed really amazing food and desserts. Everything was just delicious but the Kahlua Espresso Pie was by far the closest thing to heaven on a plate I have had in a while. Flip Burger, the Richard Blais restaurant, had mouth watering burgers (literally just thinking about it I may need to go get a napkin) the best was the d'lux. It melted in your mouth. The milkshakes were great too the star being the Captain Crunch shake which you may think twice about but it was a stoke of genius, whereas the Krispy Kreme shake we could have passed on easily. Our last meal in was at Atlanta Fish Market which provided a great atmosphere and high quality fish. They were wonderful with Lydia who joined us while we ate lavish meals she quietly enjoyed her puffs.

The second of vacation week was great too! We (Lydia and I, Eliot had to go back to work) spent lots of time with friends lunching and visiting. Lydia had a day to play with her little friends Eva and Holland and I had a day to play with mine over mani/pedi and lunch. Eliot and I went to see Jersey Boys on Saturday night and the weekend was wrapped up with soccer Sunday afternoon. All in all a wonderful 2 weeks.

Below here is a video of the shake from Flip Burger. He makes them with liquid nitrogen so they smoke! Oh and the onions rings were so good we had to get a second order!

Trip to Atlanta

2011-03-24T16:42:00.001-04:00

Getting ready to leave for the trip.

Eating Cereal at McDonalds

Hanging out while the locksmith came to unhinge our room door at 1:30 AM. (more on this later)

Napping at cousins house after playing all morning.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Hair Gone

2011-03-22T08:30:00.000-04:00

Lydia is 27 inches long at the 90 %, 16 pounds and 12 ounces 75% and her head is 16 5/8 inches in circumference reaching the quite perfect 50%. She was a trooper yesterday with her 5 shots and getting her ears pierced. It was fairly traumatic for all of us, including her pediatrician that is a veteran said it was rough. Lydia turned about the 7 shades darker than Bob the Tomato and bellowed so profoundly it shook us all to the core. Luckily it was all over in less than a minute and she happily napped most of the morning. Poor baby.

I have never been a real high maintenance person. I don't dry my hair unless it's cold or I have a cold or it's some sort of formal event. For awhile I was keeping a moderately stable length of hair just long enough to be thought of as long. My plan was to let it grow until the wedding and then I could cut few inches. During this time a good friend at work died of Leukemia (Still miss you Mo!) and just a few months earlier one of my advisee just 15 years old, Layla, also died of Leukemia. I am not very good at grief, not that many people are, but I decided that I would grow my hair and donate it to Locks of Love in their memory. I remember when Layla got her first wig how nervous she was and then when Mo got hers for her son's wedding. I thought it would be a nice tribute. It was something tangible that I could do in a terribly unexplainable sad moments. When I mentioned my plan to my hair dresser she confirmed some rumors that I had heard about the unreliability of Locks of Love. I was not going to just give my hair to some cheats especially since the thought of some corporate entity cheating cancer children may have killed Mo all over again. I held off cutting my hair until I found another nonprofit which I did; Wigs for Kids is my choice.

Honestly what may have begun as a seemingly altruistic intention is now just a necessity. My hair is long. It's ubiquitous. It's heavy. And it's got to go. At least for awhile. Luckily my hair is curly and it will need to be straightened to donate which should leave me with a length that may not be as shocking. If Lydia is 27 inches my hair is about as long. Thus today I cut my hair!

Oh Glorious Spring Break

2011-03-18T13:48:00.000-04:00

In a precious and hopefully brief two hours, I will be on Spring Break. My school generously gives us two full weeks of break which is exactly what the entire campus needs to make it through the last push before summer. Previous years I have done some great traveling adventures including my first time in Europe and a trip to Spain with my folks who had not been back in almost 30 years. Millions of Spring Break memories over a lifetime of being either a student or a teacher flood my thoughts but the anticipation for this vacation is more than it has ever been before. I am ready to be home with my baby. I can't wait to wake up on Monday and just be a mommy and a wife for that matter. I like the idea of that. Perhaps it is a little Pleasantvillestic but I don't really mind owning that daydream.

We have some appointments: the pediatrician, the hair dresser and some lunch dates with friends, as well as some lofty goals of scrapbooking to accomplish. We are also taking a mini-trip to Atlanta. Eliot lived in Atlanta during pharm school at the same time I lived there going to grad school (one of the many coincidental things about us) and I haven't been back since then which is about 10 years. This actually means two things one: I am old and two: new things to check out. My folks are coming with us which will also be nice. My mom's close cousin who is still in Cuban his daughter lives in Atlanta and has been there for the last couple of years. My mom is so excited to see her and catch up.

Our trip albeit short will be a nice getaway. Eliot and I have a bit of a Top Chef obsession and are planning on going to Richard Blais' Flip Burger and Kevin Gillespie's Woodfire Grill while we are there. The one complication is that we have given up desserts for Lent. Traditionally Sundays are days that fast can be broken but instead of breaking fast on 5 consecutive Sundays we are planning on using our fast days in Atlanta. I have discussed it with the Big Guy (or Big Gal) upstairs and we have the okay. This will be Lydia's longest road trip yet. We plan to leave in the evening to facilitate her sleeping on schedule and the XM radio is geared up to stay up to date with March Madness! Hooray Spring Break!

Park Fun and My Trauma

2011-03-17T09:01:00.001-04:00

A few years back with the initiative of Rick Baker, former St. Petersburg Mayor, every neighborhood in town developed a small park. Some are simple grassy areas with a couple of benches but most have playground equipment for children to enjoy. Last night after dinner we thought we would take advantage of the extra sunlight and go for a walk. Instead of packing up the car and heading to our usual park, we decided to walk down Allendale and swing by Roberts Recreation Center for bit to have Lydia swing there. It is a tiny little park but it was super fun. She loved all the kids running around and somehow we still managed to get a few good pictures of her looking at the camera. Lydia is so strong; most of the time she is completely holding on to the bars by herself with us in the back for safety. It was a beautiful afternoon.

Yesterday at school, I relived that pre-adolescent moment when you first become a "woman" at school. I must say that it was a bit traumatic. I had gone to the restroom after lunch and tin roof...rusted! In that moment I didn't know what to do. I actually had to rationalize that this in fact was natural and that if it wasn't for this part of nature's order I wouldn't have Lydia. I went to the school nurse to get supplies and she was kind enough to notice that I had a spot on my white skirt (argh), just like an afterschool special. She removed it with peroxide and I went off to my next class traumatized. I had to chuckle when Kim commented that I must be the prototype that all the textbooks mention: water breaking, birth on the due date and return of Aunt Flo 6 months exactly.

Baby Friendly

2011-03-16T09:15:00.001-04:00

On Friday night we went out to dinner with Aunt Kim and the Littles (Eva and Eli) to Cappy's Pizzeria in St. Pete. They have selected the best little bungalow for their location with tons of outdoor seating. It was a little cool for the outdoors on Friday night but we were seated in the perfect location with window views and space for 2 high chairs. Almost every table in the restaurant has a feel of privacy which makes it a great location for babies and kids. Cappy's also provides a selection of toys so Eli enjoyed picking out things for Eva and went back and forth several times. They were attentive and patient! And their food is always great. By the end Lydia was ready to go to bed so Eliot was rocking her in her carseat. We weren't the only ones that felt that this was a child friendly place because as we left kids were climbing the stairs outside and waiting patiently with parents. If you are close by these guys always have great take-out service.

Saturday we spent the day at the Renaissance Festival. Eliot and I had never been before and were very impressed by the experience. It is now located at MOSI in Tampa. The efficiently moved cars in to park and directed us into the main entrance. Many patrons attend in costume which we didn't realize and something surely to consider in the future. The event was very shady and had tons of food every where. We immediately go a turkey leg when we entered and barbarically ate it. There are tons of merchants everywhere. There are shows going on everywhere acrobats, human chess, jousting and stage acts. Every where we turned there was something to watch. Lydia rode in her front carry thingy for the first time and loved it (the picture doesn't show the ecstatic amusement but I promise she couldn't stop smiling)!

We liked the feel of the crowd who were welcoming and laid back even though many were tied up in bodices with bulging bosoms (the fair is not for the weak stomached.) There was a Children's Realm that had a playground, a fairy princess, a wizard and a giant who was hosting story time. Beer tastings, heena tattoos and carnival games crowded the field and some how we still found a shady haystack to sit on with Lydia while she lunched. Lydia also enjoyed the wooden mushrooms that were just the perfect height for her to stand.

The one thing I would say may be complicated would be bathrooms. If you don't like portapotties you will not be happy. And I am not sure where you would change your infant unless you did so on that haystack we found but if you are as laid back as we are and pee before you go like me, you don't even have to worry about it. It was a delightful time and we could totally image going again in years to come. Eliot even said he would dress up next time!

*Today Lydia is 6 Months! Unbelievable.

Her check up will be on Monday so stay tuned!

Lydia or Gremlin?

2011-03-15T10:43:00.000-04:00

Never get it wet. Don't feed after midnight. And never expose it to the sun. 3 simple rules and somehow all I remember from that movie is a lot of nasty crazy Gremlins.
Lydia has similar rules. Mommy can't be gone after dark. Always get at least 2 hour nap. And never ever leave the room.

The thing is that lately the attachment issue has become more evident. I certainly do not want to have a baby that can't be held by anyone but me or that she loses her mind every time she is left alone. Interestingly, during the day she is great. My parents and Eliot alternate her care and she not once has been upset by my absence, but when I am there alone with her and I leave the room the universe melts and the rage arises. And just like that adorable Gismo, Lydia after the sunset wants her mommy if she isn't there she turns into a Gremlin.

Slowly, I have been working on letting her cry a bit and then popping my head around the corner to remind her that in fact I am still very much on the planet, then pop out again for a few minutes. The thing is that there are few worse things than hearing your baby cry, seeing tears running down their little face and getting all worked up into a real frenzy so I give in eventually. I think to myself she will only be 6 months once and it will disappear in a snap of a second. If the worse thing I do is give my child too many hugs and kisses, is that really so bad?

She has also seemingly become savvy enough to know that if she wakes up at 2AM I am just going bring her into bed with us and though every parenting book, guru, swami and grandma will tell us that this is starting a hard to break pattern that will cause difficulties in many aspects of our lives. In truth, I don't sleep as well because we only have a queen size bed and I need to spread out a little. Of course add the fact that I wake up with every wiggle she makes. But at the same time, I can't just put her in her crib because she will scream still keeping us up. I can't stay up with her because I will still be up. See what I mean? What is the other option? I just snuggle her some more, is that really so bad?

Please Stand Up!

2011-03-09T13:01:00.000-05:00

Will the real Lydia please stand up!....OKAY! My baby that isn't even 6 months old just grabbed the side of her pack and play and stood up. She did again and again! My mom cried. My dad freaked. I can't believe it! Everyone is shocked. Clearly she is gifted. :)

Since I don't have a photo of her miraculous efforts today, I have attached a video of her last swinging experience at the park (below). Man she loves that swing. She played in the car too as you can see. She just squeals with delight and I am barely pushing her. She loves the park.

Last night she also tried organic puffs for the first time. They were delicious! It took her a minute to figure out what she was suppose to do with them. She keeps trying to pick them up which will improve her fine motor skills but can't quite do it yet. I tried to explain to her that she will be able to pick things up and put them in her mouth that taste good not just taste like plastic like most of her toys. On the advice of her Aunt Kim we invested in Sophie the Giraffe and that was real success! Sophie is made with all natural elements and decorated with food paints so there is no reason why she can't stick it in her mouth. Plus all the curves and notches are designed to make her gums feel good.

Why Baby Why?

2011-03-07T12:10:00.001-05:00

Why do baby teeth hurt more in the middle of the night then during the day?
Why don't babies like their faces to be wiped?
Why do the last 20 minutes of a drive home feel like 4 hours when your child is screaming?
Why is it the first time she tastes something she makes a face and spits it out but then opens up her mouth for the next spoonful and eats that one with delight?
Why is it that one day you put her down for a nap and she sleeps a solid glorious 2 hours and the next you get about 20 minutes?
Why is that the cutest outfits are outgrown first?
Why is it that sometimes the baby will be so upset they won't latch, then seconds later you show it to them again and they say "Oh yum"! and the crying stops?
Why is that one second there is no fear of that baby rolling off your bed and the next minute you glance and they are about to do a somersault?
Why is it that your baby is completely satisfied but when you pump you only get 2 drops (and then panic?
Why is that no matter how annoyed you may become, the baby will suddenly shoot a grin from ear to ear and all is right in the world?

I love to Eat!: Restaurant Reviews

2011-03-04T08:16:00.000-05:00

Eliot makes fun of me because I take pictures of food all of the time. I love to eat. I love to cook. I love to go to new restaurants. I wish I knew this when I was younger because I think I would have really been good on the Food Network or as a full time Chef. Eliot reminds me often when I daydream of going to the Culinary Institute of America that Top Chefs work a lot of hours specifically into the wee hours of the night. And still when I look back at my years as a waitress, I smile because by far that was my favorite all time random job. St. Pete is a hopping place for new cuisine and I have been storing various food opinions for this post.

1. The NEW Bella Brava is awesome! I am not sure what happened but the original was pretty good and then they had a radical menu change which was not good. I hadn't been there is a long time but they have relocated to Beach Drive and I think the move has done them a load of fantastic. My friend CD and I have gone there twice. I love going to eat with her because we always share food and so we can taste several things while we catch up on life. The last time we were there we had a bite of a sandwich that was so damn good, it was like a taste extravaganza in our mouths. The service has been top notch and I think we have tried a good bit of the menu at this point with no complaints. I must say that their tiramisu is the best in town.

2. Acropolis Greek Tavern ironically has taken over the old Bella Brava location and it is a delightful addition to the downtown eateries. Eliot and I are BIG BIG BIG fans of Greek food, so you can imagine how excited we were at this new restaurant option. We have high expectations since one of our favorite take outs is Athenian Gardens. Acropolis scored well! We had tzaziki and pita, greek salads, savory entrees of mahi mahi and orzo and finished with chocolate baklava cheesecake. The servers dance around! They throw napkins and scream OPA! Love it. Actually heading there tonight for a friend's birthday.

3. Brunches. 400 Beach Drive though many of my friends have not had the most successful of visits there, my family has enjoyed every first, including a pretty spectacular brunch buffet. I love me some brunch. Accuse me of treason because if there is a Benedict on the menu I am sold. I am particular about my eggs. I like a runny but warm yolk and not all quick order cooks pull that off. 400 Beach Drive managed this at a buffet! Pincho y Pincho (the small place next to and run by Ceviche) also had a terrific brunch and a really fantastic spicy bloody Mary. My ladies and I went there for brunch for my birthday and though our servers were slow and perhaps recovering rock stars, the food was great. After church last week we beat the brunch rush downtown and ended up at Crowleys. The food was inexpensive and standard but pretty good. They did have some bangers on the side that made a bit more Irish. My yolk was cold on my fried eggs but the coffee was good and the service was too. I must say I was put off my the smell of beer on my sugar packets but that is sorta what you get when you end up at an Irish pub for breakfast. The best thing for me here was that we found another pub that has our favorite Belgian beer, Palm, on the menu.

Baby Friendly

2011-03-03T10:26:00.000-05:00

There is a difference between kid friendly locations and baby friendly. Since I am a native, born and raised, St. Peterburgian it has recently dawned on me that I know few places that are particularly baby friendly off the top of my head. Eliot and I lead a very active life with our wonderful family and friends and really enjoy taking Lydia all over town. I started looking for resources on baby friendly locations in the Tampa Bay area and what I found was a lot about where to take kids. A kid can move and interact with things on their own so of course, Great Explorations would be a good choice. Duh. Thank you internet! My 5 1/2 month old would not be as amused, yet. Hence, I have decided that along with my periodic food establishment critiques (which is coming soon!) I will begin to evaluate the baby friendliness of various locations around town. Here is what I got so far.

1. Lowry Park Zoo. Fun for all ages. We took the Abuelos and Lydia so old and young got a kick out it. Just looking at giant animals was pretty awesome for Lydia. It has been voted the #1 zoo by parents likely because it's wide sidewalks and kids section. Lydia enjoyed the merry-go-round and seeing the elephants. There was an indoor air conditioned restaurant that was discrete enough for nursing and comfortable to get the stroller in and out. They even had infant sized hats at the gift shop when we realized that we needed one to block the sun from burning Lydia's head.

2. Crescent Lake Park. The two streets that hug the park always have some available parking and most of the time some of it is shaded. Crescent provides a lot for a family. It has over a mile path for walks and runners, tennis courts, dog parks for little and big pouches, many benches along near the lake and a playground. I go to this park at least once a week if not more. The baby loves being in the stroller and checking everything out. She loves looking at the geese and all the birds that come to the park. She has even gotten big enough to put in the baby swing. The playground has an area for smaller kids.The park also has a massive open field. You can take a blanket, some toys and relax.

Praise to all the Single Parents

2011-03-02T10:33:00.000-05:00

Eliot is a pharmacist. For the most part he has two types of shifts at the hospital basic 8 hour shift that ends around 3:30 and a ten hour shift. The ten hour shift can vary but most of the time it's an IV gig that ends around 6:30 but with Tampa traffic and the commute from USF to St. Pete he gets home around 7:15-7:30. By the time he gets home we, Lydia and I, have already accomplished a lot and started the nighttime routine.

I get home early in the afternoon and most of the time need to nurse Lydia. We then get ready to go for a walk where she naps while I don't think about my knee throbbing (my right knee is pretty much made of paper and held together by that water pasty solution similar to paper mache. I had a simple surgery a while ago and its usually okay except I wore the wrong darn shoes the other day on a long walk. This of course caused my knee to have it's own personal coup d'etat. It will pass.) We then run whatever errands need to be run like Target or Publix. A handy cart (or buggie) near by helps with the car seat in and car seat out process.

Back at home, Lydia sticks her butt in the air and gets to work on crawling and I have a little snack on the floor next to her. I sneak into the kitchen to get things going for dinner, put away dishes, yada yada yada until Lydia realizes she is alone and freaks out. Then I put her in her high chair with various eating toys (spoons, bowls, plates, etc) and a yum yum mum. I fix the dinners. Last night on the menu for us was parmesean panko crusted chicken strips and over roasted brussels sprouts/portabela mushrooms. Lydia's menu had corn and butternut squash, a stage two delight, and bananas. Once our dinner is on the way and Lydia's patience has begun to run thin, I feed her. She gets corn and butternut upper her nose, in her hair and of course all over her hands. She eats. I wipe. I eat standing up because she can't be put anywhere with the other various food goo stuck on her and I can't leave the room. I could sit down but it's the easiest step to skip.

I wash and rinse the kitchen sink. At this point everything is in the dishwasher and out of the way of curious little hands. I get the bath time fun basket and a baby towel. I strip Lydia and stick her in the sink. While she is sitting and playing in the water, I am getting her bottle ready. We play. We laugh. She freaks out when water gets in her eyes. I remind her shes fine. We drain the sink (the other day I drained the sink before she was out for two reasons. One, she was having a great time and didn't want it to end. Two, because we have a giant turtle shaped sponge on the bottom for her use only. I thought the sponge would minimize the sucking. Instead, Lydia freaked out because she could feel the sucking underneath her.) I wrap her up and off to the bedroom we go. We dry, lotion, diaper. Brush her hair and dress her.

Typically it's about now that Eliot gets home. I hand her to him so I can pee. Then he needs to eat, so I get her back. She plays. She enjoys some age level appropriate television. Reads some books. She gets the bottle and normal is rocked to sleep. Eliot is a gamer and more than happy to help, but Lydia's momitis is really only apparent at bedtime. So we rock. She falls asleep. I put her down in her crib. Scub is on (the aquatic projection toy that has soothing nighttime music) check. Puff the Magic Elephant is on (the cold water humidifier that helps Lydia's stuffiness due to the recycled air in our homes whether heat or cold air.) And she screams. I pick her up. Rock some more. And more and more. Finally she is really asleep. Down she goes.

I look at the clock and it's 9:30. My feet dragging, my paper mache knee aching, my hair knotted, I plop next to Eliot on the couch. Exhausted. Ideas of showering or moving glide through my mind because I don't have the energy to make them race through. Eventually I get to bed and sleep peacefully knowing that Eliot has two full days off in a row in the middle of the week.

Thus my praise for to all single parents everywhere! Well Done! Your efforts are recognized and you are amazing! I can't imagine how you do it because it's not easy. Being a mom is another full time job all of the time. I have said it once and I will say it again, it is easier to go to go teach all day than being a stay at home mom. But every Monday I still wish I was home with little pelusita!

Daily Life with Lydia

2011-02-25T13:03:00.004-05:00

Bathtime is going much better. Now that she is a little sturdier and she loves books. So a Sandra Boyton bath book was in order.

She particularly likes the chicken. When we put her in the tub in the bathroom she pretty much swims from side to side which is so cute. Can't wait for Mommy and Me swim lessons this summer!

Just a few moments from crawling. Her spinning scoot motion provides easy assess to various toy options. She loves that little piano...perhaps she will follow in the footsteps of her daddy and be a fancy keyboarder.

Zerbert faces in her pretty dress from her Great Aunt Maggie in Miami.Sending kisses and so use to posed pictures at this point.

Snacking while watching Mickey's Clubhouse. I thought I would be that person that would never allow their child to watch television because it rots their brains but it turns out I allow it. Not in high quantity but she really likes the bright colors and the talking mouse. We watch Dora the Explorer and Handy Manny as well to throw in our multicultural hippee brainwashing as well.

After all she is Latina which can be seen not only with her enjoyment of her Hispanic American cartoon friends but her love of mangoes. She loved them so much that she shoved the entire plate in her mouth. Deeeelicious!

Lydia is also enjoying being able to eat things on her own and not having to wait for us. This item below is a rice cereal "mum" which is banana flavored. It melts in her mouth so the choking hazard is minimal. And clearly yummy!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Slap a Soccer Ball on it and call me Mom!

2011-02-24T11:15:00.000-05:00

On Saturday I turned 35 years old. For my birthday we went to the zoo (pictures to follow) and took Lydia's grandparents (my folks) with us in my Jeep. The Jeep was sporty. Shiny. A fun vehicle to ride in though it was a gas guzzler. I enjoyed pretending I would actually use my sport utility vehicle for off roadin' and other big wheeled recreational activities and of course, as a good suburbian I never did. I never even tied a canoe to the top, not that I own one but it is clear that I am not that sporty and squishing my parents into the back seat with the baby seat was not a great long term plan but we did it on the zoo trip. We also did it when we went to Miami in the Fall. My mother and I sat in the back with the baby, my dad shotgun and Eliot drove because they have longer legs for four hours. As I mentioned previously, not the best long term plan, so we have been discussing vehicle options.

When Eliot first suggested a minivan. I stuck my nose in the air and shook my head insulted that he thought I would be that person, that mom with the minivan. Ha! I said, "No way would I be driving a minivan!" I might have even ranted about all of those bad parents with dvd players on to anesthetize their children instead of engaging with them. I might have even thought fondly of many road trips with my parents where we chatted and I got to hear stories of when they were young in Cuba. It is completely possible that I explained that there is no actual needed correlation between being a mom and having a minivan; I was sure I could parent without it. And I would end this series of reflections with a proclamation to investigate other automobile options which of course I did, and it turns out that if you want storage and to travel with people all in the same car, a small van of sorts is the ideal mode of transport. Sigh.

Hence, we got a minivan. As we began to shop for it, we hoping not to have all the bells and whistles but luck would have it that our best deal was for a minivan that is completely and totally tricked out. This car has buttons and compartments everywhere. It has automatic everything. It truly is luxury driving. When I leave my house in the morning I feel like I am getting into a space car. And it has better gas mileage than the Jeep! Henrik the Honda is truly a space odyssey!

Milky Cereal Baby

2011-02-17T11:17:00.000-05:00

I started pumping way before needing to go back to work. So I had a stock pile of milk extras when I started. This took off the pressure of having to pump enough for Lydia right off the bat. I only pump once a day and I get about 4-6 ounces which for the stage Lydia is in at the moment isn't quite enough. When I got home yesterday my mom told me she gave her formula for the first time during the day, only about 3 ounces after her solids. There was some breast milk in the freezer but not a lot, so was a good time to transition. Honestly my heart sank a little not because I ever had the intention of being hardcore breast milk only but more because I never considered the transition very well. Lydia has had one bottle of formula with rice cereal (the oatmeal cereal did not work out) before bed for a while the amount has varied so she was just fine with the change yesterday. It was me that was a little verklempt.

The skinny on the pumping at school for me is I try to squeeze it in during a free period but if not I do it during lunch which takes some work or flexibility in other areas like eating while I pump or snacking in between classes. I bring a little cooler which has ice packs where I can put in the milk containers. I pump in my car just because I have a bluetooth system and I can make phone calls, listen to NPR or a book on tape so the time goes by faster. This also prevents me from lugging all this gear on and off campus everyday. I put the little cooler in a shady area and since it has 4-6 hours before it goes bad, I can stick it in the freezer when I get home. I keep telling myself that as long as I nurse her when we are together I will continue to produce milk which all things indicate is true, including real research. So that is what I do. My new mommy mantra is "That is still super good!" "That is still super good!" "That is still super good!" and her morning feeding is still a good 5 ounces of mothers finest. It's the best we can do!

5 Months: Flipping and Teething

2011-02-16T11:51:00.003-05:00

Lydia is a flipping baby! I just received word that she finally made it to rolling over from her back to her belly. Today is her 5 months birthday! She is seconds away from crawling. She already creeps a bit. She spins. She sits fairly well but loses her balance a bit and falls over. She screams consonants and vowels mostly maamamamamammaa! And in the last couple of days she is really rambling quite a bit. I wonder what she is trying to tell us. Lydia loves to play with her toys, listen to us read and eat her books. The eating of books leads us to the following teething.

The teething is in full swing and I have to say that I am at times unsure of what else to do. We have given her fun things to chew on. Boy does she like grabbing those things and chopping on them! At times we have rubbed the nighttime Orajel on her gums which seems to soothe her to sleep. She has been sleeping well through the night so I can't complain. When I stick my finger in her mouth to feel around I can feel a slight sharpness and particularly hard gums in the center top front and bottom. Only once so far have we needed to use the baby tylenol and she really does not like the taste. Matter of fact, I tasted it and its super metalicy. Just because they don't have the words it does not mean that we should force them to gross tasting things particularly when the baby isn't feeling very well. There are moments when she is nursing that I think she may confuse the teething rings and me. That isn't too fun but I am thankful to still be able to nurse her even though I live in constant fear that I will stop making enough milk. That is terrifying for some reason. Eliot reminds me that my breastfeeding goal was 6 months which we are really close to but it's just not enough now. I want to make it to the summer so we can ween properly. And by properly I mean I want to be with her.

We are looking forward to spring break. We constantly brainstorm good family trips with a 6 month old. I am not sure she will enjoy a theme park, but maybe the zoo? An aquarium? What are good baby vacations? Eliot and I have carved out an American road-trip extravaganza for the summer, so beware The Gaurkees may be coming to a city near you! During the summer we will be enjoying a Mommy and Me swim lesson and some other family fun, but the Spring is still up in the air. What should we do?

Momitis

2011-02-10T09:12:00.000-05:00

pre-momitis eating dinner with daddy

Momitis [mom-i-tus] noun 1. The missing of the mommy 2. Thinking your mommy is lost 3. Needing your mommy at bedtime

My daughter is suffering from momitis. At first we thought that perhaps it was some cranky bedtime issues or perhaps an evening burst of teething woes but it turns out that it appears to be the need to be put to bed by her mommy. Admittedly, there is a tiny part of me that is filled with joy about this and feels super special that the last face she wants to see is mine before going beddy bye. A larger part of me however is reasonable and I feels badly for poor Eliot who is an amazing dad in a million ways and has a screaming little girl on his hands that he can't seem to console. She loves her daddy so much too. He is the fun one, much more fun than I am by far. I also feel badly for Lydia who must think that her mommy is missing or trapped under something heavy and cannot reach her.

The last couple of nights I was attending a workshop on Teaching Islam. The workshop was from 4:30-7:30. Luckily, I was able to leave work early on both days and spend several hours with Lydia before the evening of learning. This gave me an opportunity to nurse twice instead of pumping too. Even though, the resources and lesson plans were a dorky teacher's dream the report of the upset baby, however, was not. The first night Eliot sounded exhausted because Lydia's wailing was so extreme that she tired herself out and went to sleep at 7:20. When I got home, I did the carnal "no no" of picking her up and rocking with her for a while. She opened her eye for a second and went back to sleep. There was a huge possibility that that could have been disastrous but I wanted her to know that her mom was back and that she could sleep peacefully. Last night, I arrived mid-momitis break. I grabbed her, cuddled and rocked and off to dreamland she went happily. Not sure how to fix this one.

Sigh. Freshmen.

2011-02-07T14:30:00.001-05:00

For the first time since I have been teaching, which is almost 10 years now (only 8 1/2 at my current school) I have had to teach two sections of the same course differently because of behavior. My freshmen course is on Western Religions: Judaism, Christianity and Islam. One class is amazing, inspiring, fun. They are working on a group project on the Judaic Covenants using Facebook as the outline for their investigation. My other class is sitting in silence reading scripture and answer question after question because if they are asked to participation they can't. I rarely say that. They are constantly turning around, poking and touching each other, talking out of turn, trying to be funny...and I have done all the traditional responses like redirection, assigned seats, and sending home academic warnings, so I am left with silence. The problem with this method is that I feel guilty. I feel guilty making them work in silence learning information in manners that are likely the least effective for a group of students with these types of struggles but they certainly were not getting the material before with the interactive style. So I sit. They sit. We all sit. In silence.

On a happier notes, my good friend CD made Lydia the most adorable berry hat and all I can think about is going home and putting it on her head. I got to see Stephanie (friend from college) and Addi (her almost 2 month old baby girl) this weekend and they are doing wonderfully. I attended the most delightful Mickey birthday party for little 2 year old Eva and had tasty sliders for Superbowl made by Pete. And I have to say as I bit into one, for a tiny moment, I felt like a giant. :)

Yoga Blues

2011-02-04T09:04:00.003-05:00

My little hippie baby doing the boat pose

When I was a little girl I took gymnastics for years. You would think that would have enabled me to be a cheerleader or do a flip of some sort but not really. What it did provide was a lifetime of flexibility. They (ever wonder who they are?) say that once you have reached a certain level of flexibility you will always (with practice) be able to get to the same level. Over the years I have taken many of yoga classes. At some points I have taken yoga so regularly that I was able to easily stand on my head, do the dancer and stay in a plank longer than most people would like to. I was so comfortable with yoga that I added it as a part of my curriculum for Hinduism unit and lead classes in understanding different poses and how they may connect with the divine. I took several yoga classes when I was pregnant which felt great, but I haven't really done any real yoga for over a year and before being pregnant I had a Peru bug infected husband and before that I was planning a wedding and before that I was traveling all over the globe, so my yoga skills have atrophied some. Now, I am back on the yoga train and I am sore.

It feels good to go the gym and do yoga for an hour and fifteen minutes. It feels good to stretch and breath. It feels good to twist and sweat. It feels good to do savasana and be still. What doesn't feel good is missing time with my baby. Yoga coincides with the nighttime routine, so I missed the eating of the solids. I missed bathtime. I missed her night bottle and book reading. I missed putting her in her crib. She takes nap in the afternoon that is very important for her sanity after she nurses when I get home. So the small window of awake time is precious. We laugh! We play! We walk! We have a grand ol' time! I don't want to miss yoga but I don't want to miss the time with my baby either. Another mommy conundrum: Physical health versus Emotional health?

Aging Badminton

2011-02-01T14:52:00.003-05:00

As you get older your life changes so much. Not to say that I am hundred years old or anything but there are moments where my body is a little stiff and seemingly simple tasks have become more difficult. As I came into work yesterday morning my arms ached and I couldn't figure out why. Then I remembered. Lydia fell asleep during the church service and her Baptism and I was holding her the entire time. Last night she woke up hungry and we had forgotten to turn on the humidifier so she was stuffy. I turned it on at 4am so it could help a little and she wanted to stay up to party. She had to stay in the room to get the benefits of the humidifier, so I put down a blanket and slept on the floor. After only an hour on the floor, my hip aches.

In hopes of holding on to my youth I have decided I need to step up the exercising! Use my gym membership! Go for walks! Enjoy the outdoors!

Yesterday as I walked around Crescent Lake with my ladies pushing the little ladies, I saw a couple of guys putting up a net. When I looked a little closer I noticed they had badminton rackets and birdies lying on the grass getting ready for a match. As we continued to walk, not missing a beat, my mind wondered on how lovely it would be to play a little badminton on a gorgeous Florida afternoon. What a great idea! Badminton! Who would have thought. I had forgotten about this recreational delight and I attempted to remember the last time I played. It very well may have been the last time I had PE. And even now, as I really concentrate on when I played badminton last, I can not pinpoint the moment. Why do we chose to erase perfectly good memories? We happen to have a net up in the grassy area behind our house that belongs to the church. It would be an ideal place for casual game.I say 2011 is the year of the Badminton who is with me?

I Knew I was a Mother when...

2011-01-28T11:55:00.000-05:00

1. I go to work and sing "Pop goes the weasle in my head all day..." One of the toys on Lydia's exersaucer sings that song. Or chanting the mantra of "Hotdog Hotdog Hot diggity Dog." I can't even imagine what will get stuck up there when she is a little older. (Eliot does this too!)

2. The other day I had quickly slipped on some flip flops to run errands. I was gone several hours and when I returned I sat down. I saw my feet for the first time. I had been wearing two different flops all day. Sigh. Surely it will not be the last time.

3. Sticky hands...sticky forearms...sticky cheeks. I am the person who eats wings and uses literally 543 napkins. I hate feeling food on my face or hands. Before she was eating solids I could have replaced the word sticky with slimy with droll. Luckily, she has never spit up too much. Somehow, you just get over it. Lydia opens her mouth for a spoonful and then sticks her whole hand in her mouth. I can only assume she wants every drop to go in. She isn't quite an expert at that part yet. A lot of times I have to hold her hand while I feed her. I have tried letting her play with things but things are just finger licking good.

4. Someone hands YOU the crying baby in the room. The first time this happened a sense of panic came over me. I remembered thinking for a second I hope I know what to do. It turns out I did but it wasn't really a cognitive moment; it just happened. I just curled Lydia up in my arms and she fell asleep. Now when that happens it's completely natural and there are times that I just want to say "um give me my baby, please."

5. How quickly every priority is shifted. How the sound of her laugh lights up the entire day. How you think of her first always. How you want to cuddle and play all the time. How the gentleness of your baby's touch fills your whole soul instantly (sometimes I think I could just eat her up!)

Spinning Carrots are Deeeelicious!

2011-01-26T09:42:00.000-05:00

Yummy in the tummy! Lydia has really gotten the hang of this food thing which is really fun. She loved carrots and yesterday we added bananas to the mix which was equally as fun and turns out that bananas are yum yum in the tum tum as well. Actually it turns out the old saying "what goes in must come out" (it may be what goes up...but it works about the same) is also true which we learned shortly after she was done with her bananas. She had started getting a little fussy which I interpreted as her being full. I cleaned her up her face which she didn't find amusing, took off her bib, unhook her from the high chair and picked her up. Suddenly, a whiff of stinky danced by and I said, "Houston we have a problem!" When I looked down it turns out that this little whiff was a big splat up her back, Eliot and I started laughing. The laugh was a knowing laugh indicating that our itty bitty baby was stepping it up a notch in the poop department and that we no longer had the benefit of scentless infant doodoo.

She is so close to rolling over from her back to her front. She can do a pretty elaborate twist as if she was attempting a complex yoga pose. When we do twists in yoga class the instructor usually says we are squeezing out the toxins which always seems to cross my mind when I watch her but I wonder what toxins could she possibly have and what else could be squeezing out of her? Regardless, at any given second she will be make that roll and it will be on. She loves tummy time and as soon as she realizes that she can roll I imagine that she will be trying to apply that motion to her knees and she will be on the go. She can spin pretty well. some of may be curious on spinning and may not find it in What to Expect the First Year. Spinning is the milestone where you leave your baby parallel in the crib and when you check back they are perpendicular or their head is on the other side. This can drive a mommy crazy because you could swear that you left her in a certain position but evidence shows that she is no longer in that position. You question if you remembered correctly or if you are losing your mind, luckily it's neither! Your baby spins!

Finger Licking Good

2011-01-20T09:03:00.002-05:00

Monday morning Lydia went to the doctors for her 4 months check up. It is hard to believe. She is 14 pounds 6 ounces, 25 1/2 inches long. She was a little irritated with having her clothes taken off and a doctor check her out but other than that all was good. The doctor gave us the green light for solids foods, so we began the adventure that very night.

We mixed a spoonful of organic rice cereal with 4 spoonfuls of formula and we were off. At first she was a little confused. I imagine if she had words she would have asked: what the heck is this mushy stuff? Luckily at this point she doesn't and so eventually she got the rhyme of spoon and excitedly opened her mouth. Matter of fact, she was getting rather pissed in between spoonfuls because she was hungry and wanted more. The initial attempt was successful. We assumed that our gifted child would continue to enthusiastically open her mouth and want more. She would be just short of asking to pass the peas and wanting a second helping of squash. Turns out not so much.

The subsequent days she has decided she doesn't like this system. She doesn't like this whole having itty bits of mush in her mouth and wait for more itty bits of mush. She wants sustenance and she wants it, well when she wants it. I nursed her first to take the edge off and that seemed to work best. Eliot gave her a full bottle yesterday morning before and apparently she just wasn't hungry. Last night she had a good nap. We played for a bit but I didn't want to fill her up before and so I put her in the chair gearing up for some good eating time and she was angry that I would even dare to try to mush train again.

Many doctors are now saying that instead of starting with rice cereal you can start with a vegetable or a fruit because it has better taste and it also promotes healthy eating habits from the get go whereas rice cereal fills them up on a high carb diet. Philosophically I don't really have much of a preference at this point, though I understand the concepts of setting important precedents but depending on how the rice cereal goes with Abuela this morning, I may try something with flavor tonight and it may be prunes. Prunes may help get this going in other areas which may be a part of the problem. Since breastmilk is the super food that gets completely absorbed by the baby's body there often is no poop (which is a nice change from the poopslosion stage) but rice cereal can also cause things to well, to slow down, so perhaps the prunes kick start those tiny intestines and we will be back on the gravy train.