Throughout my life I feel as if I have had the internal debate of whether or not ignorance is truly bliss. In college, as I demystified biblical literature I ended up in a black hole until eventually overtime, I developed a deeper understanding and a deeper faith. Later on in life, through various circumstances the same question has come up, with not always the same eventual silver lining. On night #3 of birthing class, also known as panic attack night, the same question arose. again. As the instructor pulled out odd shaped electronic devices most of which can be inserted up your body, I began to really consider the implication of education. For hundred of years, women squated in fields, plopped out their infants and that was that. What I learned on Tuesday, I wonder, was it truly worthy of 21st century lexicon of skill development for an expectant mother?
The uterus is tilted away from the cervix for most of the pregnancy. As a woman reaches term, the uterus tilts to align itself with the cervix (Add towtruck backing up sound effect here. I did during class.) Once the alignment is completed, one of the natural ways to induce labor is having sex not because it jiggles things around up in there, but because semen (the whole reason you are in this predicament to begin with) has a natural element that initiates the thinning of the cervix (like a paint thinner if you will.) So you are super pregnant throw some semen in there and thin things out and get the show on the road.
Drug interventions can lead to more medical interventions which can lead to more strange objects (some which look like air gages and crochet hooks for real) going into places I normally do not use for storage. Getting out the label maker and make things very clear is now on my to-do list. Ah yes, and anything called a vaginal ripening agent is against my religion. I saw what happened to Eve with the temptation of the that ripe apple and I would like to think that I have learned a thing or two in the last 5770 years.
Drawing robots can not only distract you during birthing class but can work as a procrastinating tool when working on homework as well.
Dr. Lamaze believed that women feared birth so much that it caused fear which lead to tension which increased pain. Due to this realization he created a series of breathing techniques that were meant to decrease the anxiety with childbirth and ultimately distract the mother to be. It's a fairly understandable theory if I am sitting there thinking about the pacing of my breath or creating patterned breathing, I am sure I will completely forget about the virtual earthquake that is occurring in my insides. Surely, a few "who who, hee hee" will subside all fear and tension. Sarcasm aside, this breathing seems almost more useful for Eliot than it does for me. He seems to enjoy the practice. The most useful thing learned in class tonight was some pushing positions and pressure relieving massages that Eliot can do while I am focusing on my moan during contractions. Apparently, your pelvis automatically relaxes when you moan. Makes sense.
We did we get a gold star tonight from our teacher tonight for being the most laughing couple. We can't help but be goofballs and apparently that is an essential quality to have during the birth experience. She encouraged everyone to be more like us. Ha! We Rock!
We attended our first Birthing Class at Bayfront Baby Place. As a normal class of any sort, there is the get to know you period. All first time baby people, with plenty of nerves and questions about the process. Several nervous dads to be and moms to be worried about pain seemingly normal concerns overall. A very kind and knowledgeable teacher shared some must knows such as how to time contractions, how to understand the contraction, and when to high tail it to the hospital. The earnest information of waiting at home as long as possible and being sure to get a snack or ten before checking in because the hospital won't feed you until the baby is out. All good stuff.
Then we started on the nitty gritty. Labor. The process. The stages. The phases. Did you know there are three phases to the first stage of the process of labor? Who knew! Contractions begin slowly and get more intense as the dilation furthers. The contractions get stronger as you get to what is called politely the transition phase but could be also understood as def-con 4 or go time or holy crap there is baby coming out! The video was a real treat. My cervix will be like one of those silly bands...thin and all funny for bit.
Giggly like school children Eliot and I looked at each other with knowing astonishment. Thank goodness I married my best friend. Two peas in a pod about to be three. Wowzer!
A few years ago a friend of mine got into applique. I was inspired by her and made a few onzies for little Eva as she entered the world. Baby Girl Gaurkee is about to enter the world and I feel the need to be crafty on her behalf. I purchased some onzies. I found the cutest iron-ons and threw caution to the wind! With a few more to play with I will do the more traditional appliques.
I am still crocheting a bit. I ordered a baby crochet book which I am hoping will be as easy as reviewed by the other amazon users, plus my crochet guru has been patiently teaching and I am getting better at reading patterns. So I am excited about my prospects.
I have seen my crochet guru and I am working on a hat project that is not quite finished yet. It hopes of practicing a bit before our next hang out session I followed a simpler pattern and completed two little hats. Both are cute, but both are from the same pattern. If you make note of that, you will notice that one is bigger than the other, which ultimately means I messed up somewhere, but I am a proud crocheting mom-to-be that happily finished two stylish head pieces for my precious little 32 week old squash.
The nursery is almost ready just a few things left to get ready and I will post pictures!
It dawned on me yesterday as I went to my 8th month midwife visit that I was 32 weeks, and that my due date is Sept. 14 which means that this whole pregnancy thing is actually 10 months! It is the biggest urban secret that pregnancy is a 9 month ordeal. Over dinner last night with a couple of friends we determined that to be exact there is slightly more than 4 weeks each month. Roughly there are 4.3 weeks in each month which means that pregnancy at best is still 9.33333333333 months long! Either way, it's more than they sell it. I have really enjoyed my pregnancy and it has been a real gift from God. But I think we should be honest about this whole thing! It's 10 months---prepare yourselves! It's not so bad! It gives you a few more weeks to get things ready! To relax!
59 days and go! Next week: Birthing Class. Registering at the hospital. Scheduling the pediatrician pre-natal appointment. Finishing all outstanding house projects.
In the tradition of mythical characters that can sleep for days like Sleeping Beauty and the Rip Van Winkle, I once was able to join that illustrious club with pride. In high school, friends thought that I could possibly have narcolepsy because I would fall asleep within minutes. I could sleep through hurricanes (Elaina, I barely remember because of that), I would sleep through phone calls and door bells. It was a gift from the gods.
I am 30 weeks. My little girl is the size of a head of lettuce. What does that mean? It means that sleeping is getting a little more difficult. Every squirm and roll causes me to wake up. I am warm and cold at the same time. I have pillows shoved in all sorts of directions and if one moves a slight bit, it wakes me. There are so many things left to do, that I keep thinking about those too. Just when my eyes are heavy and I am fading into dreamland, that is the precise moment that my baby girl wants to stretch, kick, roll and readjust herself. I ordered the magic mommy sleep pillow which should arrive tomorrow. All the reviews, magazines and baby books swear that this pillow is amazing. I am hoping it's true. In the last 3 days I have slept a total of 10 hours or so. Any suggestions?
On Wednesday, I had to go to Quest Diagnostic to retake the glucose test which I had failed the last time. The only thing is that this go around it wasn't in the warmth of my midwife's office but in the cold lab machine that is open to all. It also wasn't just a short hour of time. It was three hours of seclusion. Three hours of waiting and getting poked. More blood sucking happening than on Twilight.
I had to fast from the night before and then not eat again all morning, so about 14 hours of not eating for a woman that is eating for two it's not easy. It on the verge of abusive really. Eliot was sweet enough to come with me. We arrived at 7:45 am and they took my baseline blood draw. Then they ask you to drink 10 ounces of liquid sugar water which tastes like flat orange soda. After you wait. About 30 minutes later, baby girl woke up with a jolt. It seems like the sugar water gave her a sugar high. She was kicking, rolling over, wiggling...overall going nuts.
The phlebotomist escorted us to a special room away from the rest of the waiting room riff raff. The tiny room had two large recliners, a table full of magazines and boxes of disposable lab coats which she offered to me in case I got cold which I did and was thankful to have those. I dosed in and out of wakedom and ever hour Eliot would tell me it was time. I would waddle out to her, she would take my blood and I would cozy back up in the recliner.
After the fourth stick, my arm was sore and my tummy was rumbling. We gathered our things and went to Cracker Barrel (or better known to me as Crackle Barrel) for huge breakfasts. We then headed home for lovely afternoon naps.
Now we wait. Once again with fingers crossed. Mind you, I am about 7 1/2 months pregnant by the time they get this thing together with results and such I would really only have to be concerned for about a month, not so bad. I just can't seem to picture food choices without carbs at the moment.